Broken Dreams

The Quiet

Ahsoka Tano walked away from the huge statues with their mouths sewn shut staring her down as she descended the dark steps.

What a relief.

She finally wasn't something she was pretending to be. She wasn't walking a path alone, only with her shadow beside her. Wasn't isolated. Not anymore. Now she could be free, could find people she could care about without being punished for it.

The Wordless God had to let her go. She could leave if she wanted to.

Again.

Suddenly Ahsoka was hit with a wave of pain and guilt. The Lost Temple wasn't the only temple she had left.

"Ahsoka, wait! I need to talk to you! Why are you doing this?"

"The council didn't trust me. So how can I trust myself?"

"What about me? I believed in you, I stood by you!"

"I know you did, Anakin. And I'm grateful for that. But this isn't about you. I can't stay here any longer. Not now."

"You are making a mistake!"

"Maybe. But I have to sort this out on my own."

"Ahsoka...I understand wanting to walk away from the Order."

"I know."

She was startled out of her thoughts by nearly getting hit by a speeder. "Watch it!" The driver yelled as he sped away.

"You watch it," she muttered.

Then she covered her mouth with her hand.

She'd spoken.

Ahsoka Tano hadn't said a word for four years, since her initiation into the Quiet.

A grin spread across her face, her dry lips cracking with the estranged movement. She laughed out loud. Actually laughed, not just on the inside.

She used the Force to jump up onto a rooftop, her landing a bit askew. He senses had dulled; being among the Quiet didn't require any use of them. Being Force-sensitive wasn't outlawed, but it was safer to not be. These days, bounty hunters' main targets were former Jedi and Sith. People wanted revenge.

She leapt from rooftop to rooftop, heading west. If her bearings were right and her friend hadn't been evicted, she'd be at her apartments by dawn.

It felt good to be out in the open, not just in the confined quadrangle at the Temple. Members were not allowed to leave except on assignments, but she wasn't a member anymore. That happy grin broke out over her face again.

The first sun finally poked out over the horizon of towering structures, and she realized she'd overshot. She dropped down to street level and wound between the buildings, searching for the familiar blue of the apartments.

People began to emerge onto the streets, and when they spotted Ahsoka they stared. One mother even picked up her child and hurried away. Then she realized she was still wearing her Quiet robes. She mentally kicked herself. She'd been a part of a cult. Of course she stuck out.

Trying to keep her head down, she spotted a servant boy waiting outside a food shop. She approached him, pulling a stolen ration pack out of her pocket.

"Hey," she said hoarsely. He didn't hear her.

Curse my vocal chords, she thought angrily. She cleared her throat and spoke louder.

"Hey, buddy. You hungry?"

He turned to face her in surprise and took in her outfit. He took a half-step back.

"Yeah," he said cautiously.

"Let's make a trade." She held out the ration pack to him. He took it eagerly, fear gone for a moment.

"What do you want?"

"Your cloak."

He removed it and handed it to her, tearing into the ration pack ravenously.

Leaving him with a slightly fuller stomach, Ahsoka continued her search. Finally, after what felt like hours but was probably only a few minutes, she was met with the periwinkle blue of the apartments.

It was so early that the receptionist wasn't even there yet, so Ahsoka let her memory of the place guide her up the turbo-lift and onto the twelfth floor.

She wandered the hallway, looking at the different doors in bewilderment. The symbols marking who lived there had changed. She searched for the familiar yellow emblem, but all were grey.

Luckily, a morning cleaner happened to be exiting the turbo-lift at the other end of the hall. She approached her quickly, while she was still pulling her things out of the lift. "Excuse me," she said quietly. The cleaner jumped.

"Can I help you, miss?" She asked, regaining her composure.

"I'm looking for Padmé Amidala. Does she still live here?"

The cleaner cocked her head, obviously searching her mental databanks.

"No, she lives about four floors down. Her apartments have a pink emblem, shaped like a jogan."

Relief flooded Ahsoka. "Thank you," she said quickly before whirling into the lift. She bounced from foot to foot, excitement taking over. She didn't even register going to her door, because the next thing she knew she was knocking.

A swish of clothes, then the peephole opened and an eye peeped out.

"Yes?"

Ahsoka removed her hood.

Padmè Amidala gasped, yanked open the door and grabbed Ahsoka into a hug.