"Are you jealous again? Why don't you join me instead so you won't get jealous." She said as she walked faster.
"— I was just asking. I don't mean anything." I said.
It was later that evening, when I discovered, in her cellphone the video of him, going down on her as she shouts his name. As if it wasn't enough, when I barged in the shower room—
— I caught them fucking in one of the stall.
The air in my lungs starts to be trapped. I wasn't able to say anything, anything to stop them. My tears fell as I slowly walk inside.
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"Why?" That's the only word that left my mouth as Seulgi and Jungkook tried to cover themselves.
I never broke my eye contact on Seulgi as Jungkook got out of the room. Seulgi just starts to wear her clothing dismissing me.
"I want to know why. Why did you do this?" I asked.
She didn't speak and just clutched the towel she was holding. I grabbed her arm, "WHYYYY???!!!!"
Seulgi slapped me.
I heard her scoffed. "Because you're boring, controlling and can't take a hint. He's exciting— and I don't have to explain myself— this is your fault. I never felt anything special when I'm with you— you used to be fun to be with— now— you're just boring."
"I love you." I said as I slumped to the cold tiles of the bathroom. "If this is just a phase—"
"I don't. It's not a phase— I wasn't able to tell you but— I— I don't love you anymore." Seulgi left as stayed inside, crying in the corner of shower stall.
That was the beginning of the end.
The complicated relationship we both have.
— because after that night. Jungkook avoided her and she ran back to me.
Only some memories are etched deeply in my brain. Memories of what I saw in that video and no matter how hard or how strong my feelings are still for her, I can't accept her back.
She pretended we're still together. Gossips of what transpired in the shower room spread like wild fire in the dorm. Even if she did horrible things to me, I cannot turn a blind eye whenever guys are catcalling her or asking her to join in their shower. I didn't object about me being used as a stand in.
