hot ones

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you groaned as a ringing noise had woken you up from your peaceful nap. you lazily reach for your phone and press 'accept'.

"hello?" you say in a croaky voice as you rub your eyes wth the back of your hand.

"shit, did i just wake you up?" you immediately recognise finneas' voice.

"yeah buts it's an exception when it's you." you say with a smile.

"wow, i feel special. anyway, you remember the interview that billie did with the dude from the show 'hot ones' and tried all the hot sauces?" finneas says.

"yeah, why?" you ask.

"i just received all of the sauces today, you wanna try them?" finneas asks.

"not all of them. oh no, how about just the hottest one?" you say.

"okay, be here in fifteen?"

"of course."

you park your car in the driveway and let yourself into finneas' home. your keys make a jingley sound as you put the key into the lock and turn it.

as you opened the door, you were hit with a strong smell of fried chicken. you could also hear a faint bubbling of chicken in the deep fryer.

"smells delicious in here!" you shout, signalling that you were here. you put your keys in the bowl at the table near the entrance and go to the kitchen.

"thanks babe. how are you?" finneas asks.

"i'm good." is all you say. finneas just looks at you weird.

"i can tell that your nervous. nervous for the hot sauce." finneas teases. you swat him away.

"you've tried this before so don't go and tease me." you say as you take a seat the the dining table.

after a while, finneas had finished making the soy drumsticks. "so you've tried this and billie has tried this on camera." you say.

"well yeah, but billie had to do all of them. we're just gonna try the hottest one, according to you." finneas says.

"i can't believe they actually mailed this to you guys. you know, if you wanna torture yourself some more." you say as you open the sauce bottle. you immediately get grossed out by the top of it. finneas notices this and takes the bottle from you.

"ew gross, you have to shake it up." finneas smiles and takes a stick from the drumsticks that he has made and shoves the sauce further down into the bottle.

"it's so chunky and dried up. oh my god, it literally looks like a backed up butthole." you say as you rub your eyes.

"a backed up butt hole, a thing i've never looked into."

"you've never taken a peek down there?"

"you apparently just eyeballing the backed up butthole."

"a telescope that bends down into my asshole." finneas just stops shaking the bottle and smiles at you.

"a backed up butthole. crazy." finneas says.

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