Chapter 8: Cold

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Breeze blowing into my eyes made it hard to see. It was hard to get a cab at 5 in the morning. I looked around frantically. It would have been easier to steal Malone's keys and use his car, but I wasn't going to sink myself into any more shit than I had going on already. A taxi appeared and I basically begged the driver to take me. He looked exhausted, but he agreed.

Saint Joseph's Hospital was huge. I was amazed that in all my years of being here, I had never noticed this place. I shot out of the cab, handing the driver a 100 bill and told him to keep the change. Was that too impulsive? Maybe. But I didn't have time. Emmet was in the reception and rushed out to see me. I spotted Alex sitting with his head in his hands. Emmet hugged me. He'd been crying. He and Alex were much closer to Jason than I was. That's not to say I didn't feel sad. I did. I had few friends.

"Jason got stabbed," he repeated. He started crying again.
"Where? How? Wh-"
"Some queer-bashers got him as he left a client. They even cut 'burn fag' into his skin. He could have taken them in a fight. You know that. But he didn't know they-" He broke down again. I was washed with a sense of dread. Jason was the toughest guy I knew after Gio, and he'd gone down so easily. Someone like me wouldn't stand a chance. I suddenly felt really vulnerable.

"Was this in Boystown?"
"No. A little way out, around Park West. It was a house call. He's lucky someone called 911 before he passed out."
"How did you know he was here?"
"He listed Alex as his emergency contact."

I thought that seemed weird. Why was Alex Jason's emergency contact? I thought it would be someone else, like Dorian or even Robert. I wondered how close they really were. Alex told me they were roommates in College, and even dated for a while. But to have your ex still listed as an emergency contact was a little off. Maybe they had it set up when they were roommates and hadn't changed it since. I rubbed Emmet's back as we walked together into the reception.

"Hey."
"Hey..." Alex looked really beat. He was probably sleeping when he heard the news. He also looked like he'd been crying. I felt so out of place here. Jason was my friend, sure, but I didn't think him close enough to actually make me cry. Maybe I was blunting myself for a reason. I already felt sure he'll make it out alive. Or maybe I was hoping so hard I couldn't consider the possibility of him dying. I held Alex's hand and tried to smile. He looked back and smiled weakly, before rubbing a tear out of his eyes.

"So what do we do now?"
"We're waiting for any updates."
"How was he, when they took him?"
"I don't know. I wasn't told anything other than 'we're doing our best to stabilize him'."

I sat with them in silence. Doctors and nurses in scrubs walked past every few minutes and Emmet got up, expectantly. Alex eventually had to hold him down and comfort him. After thirty minutes, he fell asleep on Alex's shoulder. I just sat by myself in silence. I wondered what Malone would think when he wakes up alone. Would probably think I had abandoned him. I picked my phone to compose a short message.

"Could you call Tom?" Alex asked. Tom was Jason's older brother. He was married and lived in a different state. New Jersey, I think. They barely kept in touch; Tom was not entirely accepting of Jason's sexuality. He probably didn't even know Jason sold sex. Alex handed his phone to me with Tom's phone number highlighted on the contacts list. I looked at the phone but did nothing.

"Come on. We don't know if he'll make it or not. Tom should be ready for the news."
"He'll make it." I said it so firmly, I almost believed myself.
"You don't know that." Alex raised his voice a little. He was only trying to alert the family, I understood that. But I didn't think we should bother Tom just yet. I didn't want a situation where Tom decided to come to Chicago, all filled with worry, only to find that there wasn't so much to worry about. I refused to make the call. Alex looked frustrated.

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