Chapter 6: Sun

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Rays shone into my eyes and I woke up on Malone's chest. I loved the soft hairs and I nuzzled in closer, breathing in the scent of him. We had made love four times last night. I had to call it love-making because it wasn't just fucking. Malone was gentle with me. He took his time, touched me in all the right places, made me want him. By the fourth time I was just too hungry for him. He had made me top him the third time, which was nice. He was tight, and I didn't last more than a few minutes because I was so sensitive and I wanted him so bad. He still made me whimper after I came out of him. I smiled contently before my warning bells began to chime again.

 What are you doing to yourself Michael? Get up and get out now before it's too late. I ignored the voice in my head. I liked Malone. I wasn't it love. More like a fondness. Even if I never ended up loving anyone or as part of a couple, at least Malone had showed me what it felt like to be lovingly fucked. And the scary part was that I wanted him to do me. Over and over, as many times as he wanted. He could use me as he desired. Now I felt like a whore again.

 At least some things never change. The voice in my head was snickering at me. I sighed aloud and ignored it as I rolled off Malone. We were in his bedroom, obviously the one he had shared with his lover. God rest his soul. I started towards the bathroom but a hand grabbed my wrist and pulled me back.

 "Jeff, don't go!"

 I looked at him. He was startled and sitting up, before his mind came back to a realization of what was going on. I felt something crack inside me. Probably the glass over the illusion that I had been in anything of semblance to a relationship.

 You're just a replacement Michael. Know your place. The voice came back. I looked at Malone and he let go of my arm. Now everything was awkward. He closed his eyes and relaxed again in bed. I walked into the bathroom and took a well-deserved piss. I had been holding that in all night. Malone's bathroom, like most of this house, was spacious. The house had only two storeys, but was about as tall as the three storey house beside it. The ceilings were so high, I felt really dwarfed. I got back out of the bathroom and found Malone sitting on the bed.

 "I had an awesome night," I said.
"Yeah, me too." He was smiling widely like an excited child. This made my next few words more painful to say.
"I gotta go now. Work calls."

His smile faded slowly as he must have remembered that I wasn't who he expected me to be. He crossed over and held me by the waist and kissed me. His kisses always seemed so strong. I leaned against him for a bit before I pulled away and walked off to get my clothes. Our clothes were still in the lobby downstairs, where he had stripped them so rapidly the night before. I smiled, remembering how he had made me feel like a virgin again. I started throwing on my clothes. He walked down the stairs to me, still naked and pushed a hundred dollar bill into my hands.

 I was confused now and my face showed it. He held my face with one hand.

 "It's for the cab, Mike. I can't drive you back."

 I nodded before I walked out the door. I didn't even say goodbye. I had to learn better manners.

  

The cab ride was spent flicking through memories as my loins stirred. Malone had me hooked; I couldn't even deny it to myself. I remembered the kissing, the groping, the gripping, and the pounding. It was enough to make me leak a little cum in the car.

 Get a grip Michael! I couldn't believe myself. I was pining over the guy with the dead boyfriend who wanted to use me as a replacement. This was beyond pathetic. Suddenly the car stopped.

"What's going on?"
"We're here."
"Oh."

 I paid and got out, before strolling into Dorian's apartment. Rob was in. He was also one of the veterans; he started around the same time as Emmet. But he wasn't always around or as dedicated, so Dorian couldn't leave the running of things to him. Yet, he spared Fridays to work the station. He mumbled a greeting as I walked in.

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