Dear Evan Hansen Oneshots (mainly kleinsen)

Dear Evan Hansen

POV: Jared
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Dear Evan Hansen,

It's how all my letters start. A message to the person you're thinking about at that moment. It's some stupid assignment from my therapist. It's supposed to allow me to think about others and speak my true mind about them, so I slowly get out of the habit of spitting out whatever comes to mind at school.

"What are you, like, an acorn?"

"So how's it feel to be the first person to break their arm by jerking off?"

"Oh my god."

At least my therapist knows I have trouble being anything but an asshole around other people.

So far, this assignment hasn't really helped me be a better person at school or anything. Still a big ol bully. I don't really understand how the assignment's supposed to help me, but it's kinda fun.

Today's gonna be an amazing day, and here's why.

No, I didn't have to write that. My letters weren't self motivation letters, but ever since Evan told me he was writing them, I've been writing that first sentence too.

Evan doesn't know that I write letters. Hell, he doesn't even know I go to therapy. Why would he? Why would I tell him? He would just think I'm another retarded kid like him, which I'm not, by the way.

Here's Evan, going to therapy to help him make friends. Meanwhile, I'm going to therapy to help me make friends. We're going for the same reasons, but not exactly. Like, Evan has social anxiety, I'm literally just an asshole.

Because today I'm really gonna speak my mind, which I really don't do much. Especially around you.

Here's Evan, struggling to make friends and googly-eyeing Zoe every day. Meanwhile, there's me, only having one friend, who I googly-eye. Except, I'm not as bad as Evan. I don't make it extremely obvious that I like him.

Haha, 'like him'. I definitely don't just 'like him'. At this point, it's more than that.

I want you to know how beautiful you are.

You don't need to be around Evan to see how amazing he looks. His dirty blonde hair, always a little messy and a little all-over-the-place, but at the same time, that kinda describes him as a person. His blue eyes, that I just wish with all my heart would stare into mine for just a few moments, no words necessary. His hands, kinda small but definitely not as small as mine. I've always wondered how soft they might be. His lips... I only wish I could feel them with my own one day.

I want you to know how funny you are.

He's adorable. He's not like me, going around and making sex jokes and teasing people, but rather he makes you smile by just being himself. He's afraid to speak his mind, too, sure, but at least he shows he's afraid to speak his mind, instead of being like me and covering it up.

I want you to know how I thoroughly enjoy every second spent in your presence.

It's like Evan has a large bubble around him. When I enter that bubble, I always feel immediately happier. I feel like, for just a moment, that everything may have a happy ending. As if I made a move, right then, right there, I wouldn't give a shit until after I left his bubble. He makes life disappear right before my eyes, in a good way.

I want to know that I think you're perfect just the way you are. You don't need to change.

I want you to know I love you, Evan Hansen.