Every tear's a waterfall, every scar's a vile reminder

Chapter 8

He was exhausted. His shift had started at 08:30 and it's was now 16:00. He needed food, water and a sit down.

It only then dawned on him, he'd promised to visit stiles this morning but he hadn't. He hadn't even had chance to.
He ran to the break room to grab his lunch then made his way to stiles' room, deciding to spend his lunch there.

As he approached the door, he heard nothing, a complete and utter silence so he decided to knock gently and walk in.
Stiles wasn't in his bed and Derek immediately panicked, thinking stiles had left or been taken.

However when he heard a deep, guttural gargle from the toilet he was on alert. He dropped his lunch and drink into the chair next to stiles' bed and ran to the door of the bathroom, trying to open it only to find it locked.

He shoulder barged the door as he heard stiles vomit more, shouting stiles' name as he did so. Stiles went quiet.

Derek stopped trying to force the door open and decided that talking to stiles would make it easier.

"Stiles?" Derek called as he leaned against the door. However there was no answer.

"Stiles please answer me."

"What Derek?" stiles grumbled in a coarse, deep voice that had been subjected to abuse.

"Please come out?" Derek stated as a question.

The room was quiet for a few moments, and just as Derek was about to question stiles again he heard the gentle unlocking of the door, however it didn't open.

Derek stood hesitantly and latched onto the door handle, scared about what he was about to witness in the bathroom. He was way out of his depths here. Derek pushed the door open slowly, revealing stiles splayed out on the floor with his iv stand next to him. He looked only semi-conscious, with his eyes half lidded and body sagging out of exhaustion.

Derek made his way over to stiles and bent down, inspecting stiles' self destruction. Stiles had been making himself vomit.

Derek sighed sadly and debated what to do, not wanting to leave the poor boy on the floor. He leaned down and enveloped the small boy in his arms, securing him against his chest as he lifted the horrifically lightweight boy into the cradle of his arms.

Stiles passed out against his shoulder. Derek looked down at the boy as you would a lost puppy, stiles was so timid and gentle yet dangerous and destructive.

Derek made his way over to the bed and gently placed the boy on top of the quilt. He then pulled up another spare blanket over the boy and secured the IV stand in its place. Derek day next to the bed and began eating his lunch, deciding that stiles needed someone to watch him for his own safely.

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Just when Derek ate the last mouthful of his sandwich, stiles twitched in his bed. Derek braced expecting stiles to shoot up as a result of a nightmare however stiles simply stirred and turned over in the bed to face Derek as his eyes fluttered open gently.

Stiles jumped at the sight of Derek staring at him, however once he realised that it was only Derek he melted back into the blanket he was cocooned in.

"Hey" stiles whispered.

"Hi stiles, feeling any better?" Derek asked with a sad smile directed at stiles. Stiles froze.

"D-Derek please don't tell anyone about that. I mean I physically couldn't keep it down anyways and I-" Derek cut stiles off.

"Stiles I know, even I can understand that we can't expect you to keep foods down, and seeing as it was your first day on solid foods, you did amazingly to even try and eat something, so don't beat yourself up more over it, you should be proud of yourself" Derek spoke surely and honestly.

Stiles' eyebrows furrowed in a confused manner and Derek decided to let it go, knowing it was most likely stiles' self doubt making him question Derek's honesty. After all Derek could see stiles searching his face, his eyes to see if he could find any hint of a lie. That broke Derek's heart more knowing he had been lied to so much.

"Anyway stiles, I'd like to apologise for saying I'd be in this morning to see you, as I was on my way in we got hit with a large number of casualties"

" Derek don't even apologise, other people's lives are much much more important than my morning conversations" stiles said with a look of disbelief on his face.

"Stiles you are important and so are your morning conversations so don't doubt that. Anyways I really really hate to break this but I have to reach a full mental evaluation on you by the end of today, so I'm going to have to ask you more questions." Derek mentioned shooting a sympathetic look in stiles direction as he made his way to the door where the doctors notes were held.

"So stiles, I'm going to start at the point we left yesterday however I want you to know that the same rules apply, if you want to stop at any point then tell me and we will take a break" Derek said and stiles nodded to him.

"So, are you in danger of repeated bodily harm from anyone?" Derek asked, swallowing hard.

"Erm yes? Well I was..." stiles spoke unsurely however Derek knew what he meant.

"Did someone else cause the non-self inflicted wounds and if so who was it?"

"Yes and it was my father and also just some random people at my school"

"Do you know the names of the people who did this to you?" Derek asked and he could immediately see stiles starting to shut down again as the panic bubbles up within him.

"Hey hey stiles it's fine, we can take our time here okay"

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Something within stiles snapped. Derek has been so kind and supportive since he had arrived here but there was still that knowledge that he was just a patient and nothing more. The day Stiles left this hospital he would probably never see him again.

The fact that Derek has said the word "we" implying that they were doing this together, that they were a team had my heart clenching. Stiles didn't want to go home, most people say they hate the hospital however this had been one of the most enjoyable experiences of his life.

"Stiles?" Derek asked unsurely.

"Sorry... erm yeah it's erm Jackson whittemore and Matt daehler" stiles mentioned with a shaky voice.

Derek lent in close to stiles and his eyes darkened.

"Stiles I just want you to know that whoever has done all of this to you, made you suffer like this will be made to suffer themselves and if that isn't through the works of the justice system it will be through me, I want you to know off record that no body should ever have to go trough what you have gone through in the short time you have been alive, and the fact that you have survived this will do nothing but make you stronger" Derek spoke with pride and vengeance and power and everything stiles wanted to hear from the beautiful man.

Stiles let a single tear escape down his cheek as he kept direct eye contact with Derek, hoping that some of the power and meaningfulness of Derek's words would actually reside within him as fact for once, rather than letting him convince himself that Derek was lying.

Derek has helped him so much in the three days they had knew eachother, and the feeling stiles had for Derek were already almost unbearable so stiles was scared.

So scared. Of the rejection, the fear but most of all, he was afraid of love.