This is the first pilot I've ever written. I know the premise sounds like Twin Peaks or Stranger Things, and in truth, this pilot was inspired by those two great shows.
In fact, this only exists because I bought some 3D models that looked like they could belong in those two universes, and I kinda wanted to animate them.
This will also be the only episode of the fictional show... so... like... yeah...
I'm mostly looking for feedback about the dialogue, characters and especially structure. I'm wondering if the story beats are in the right place or not. (Please disregard the acts, I just segmented the story up to get around some of Wattpad's restrictions. Any other kind of criticism is absolutely welcome.
I know that Wattpad isn't especially good for screenwriting, so, below this foreword you can find the script... in a proper script-like format...
If you do just want to read it here, the format goes:
[CHARACTER NAME]
[(brackets describing how they say something).]
[Actual Dialogue.]
Sorry, that's just the best I can do.
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Recommended reading method: https://drive.google.com/open?id=1pBI-lbWXnKwd0bifU40zKBObJLUlVgoa // you can also find the link in the comments... where it's clickable... on PC at least...
YOU ARE READING
ROCKWELL (pilot)
Mystery / ThrillerAn evil force is after a power hidden in the small town of Rockwell, and one girl holds the key to unlock it. If these individuals succeed, Rockwell will just be the start of their list. In this episode: When little Elizabeth Hayward goes missing, h...
