A Little Hope (usuk)

Alfreds Past...

~*~ character back stories are different! Please read ~*~

Alfred F. Jones. Known as the most annoying brat in middle school. Alfred was oblivious to the hatred around him. Or At least he pretended to be. Alfred has a nice family. Very close and warm. His older sister Amelia had some complications with self harm. But he didn't know that. Alfred's bubbly energy and happiness seemed to scare the sadness away. Also because he was only 6.

Alfred has always had problems with the bullies. They started to target and harass him in 2nd grade, but he figured everyone got bullied. He fooled himself to believe he was okay for seven years. His two best friends in 2nd grade, Harvey and Sam, would always let him sit with them. They would hang out. Then one day they rejected him. And they kept at it. Three weeks of 'sorry not today' and Alfred snapped. He told them off as much as a 7 year old could. They didn't even blink. Alfred had to find another friend. He turned to a group of people he had known sense kindergarten. Chris was basically the leader. And Ashton was the 'right hand man'. Then there was Casey, Kelly, Amber, Alec, and his twin brother Matthew.

God, he missed those days in 3rd grade. He was the centre of attention, the class clown, everyone loved him. Things were looking up. That was until the following year. It was like Harvey and Sam all over again. Except more subtle. They would warn each other when they saw him coming. And they would leave when Alfred was distracted. Which happened more often than you thought, due to his ADHD. His ADHD was horrid. He was bad a focusing, and he would have to leave class to take some medication. People thought he was sick. Maybe contagious.

This treatment never stopped. Not until high school...anyways. You would think that growing in all this negativity would have him broken and bested right? Wrong...Dead. Wrong. Alfred always wore a smile. It only faltered when he was called mean names. Alfred never got physically hurt. But the emotional damage was enough.

One day. He was listening to one of the songs he sings when he's sad. Hate me, by Blue October. He sang the lyrics. He knew them by heart. He has heard it thousands of times. Walking into the cafeteria, he was completely unaware of the pair of bushy eyebrows, following him. Chris, one of Alfred's closest friends, turned around from the lunch line and said something he knew was offensive. He took off his headphones. Chris had basically called his taste in music, shit...oh...

They argued...well. Alfred was basically just accepting the multiple insults that poured out of his mouth. Fed up with this he tuned him out, Chris had finally lost interest in him and turned back to the line. Alfred put his music back on. As the song was ending, he was walking to his usual table after he gathered his lunch. Chris' table. He shot an irritated glance at his brother for not standing up to him as he went on falling. .....wait.... . Falling? That's right. He tripped on Chris' foot. Alfred tossed his trey in front of him in order to break his fall with his hands.

Humiliated again. Humiliated, and no one even bothered to help him up. That's what he was waiting for. He was begging in his mind, mentally searching for someone who would help him up from his state of misery. He waited. He heard laughter. HUMILIATING. THIS IS HUMILIATING. Sobs crawled up his throat and threatened to escape his lips. He waited. NOBODY LOVES ME. The pain in his throat became too great as his eyes started to water. WHY? WHYWHYWHYWHY ME?! All of these thoughts raced through his mind and took another chunk of happiness from him as he got up. Hot tears pricked the corners of his eyes. It was too much. He couldn't hold it in anymore. The rawness in his throat clawed and dug it's way out as Alfred let out a shaky breath and started to cry. He ran out of the room, his brother not far behind him.

Alfred ran though the halls, to the library. It was lunch time, so no one was there. He made his way through the maze of bookshelves, loosing himself in them. He collapsed in the back corner of the room and broke down. He did this a lot. He alway got broken. 'It hurts so fucking much!' Alfred talked to himself in his mind. 'Why does it have to be me? I haven't done...anything...' Alfred continued to mope and cry. Loud cries shaking his body. Tears staining his knees. Rocking back and forth he tried to calm himself. He felt an arm go around him, he was startled. It was his brother. Alfred hid his face and turned away from him.his brother continued to hold him and rub circles oh his back. Alfred couldn't blame his brother...

After around 15 minuets, Alfred could breath normally, He left with a thank you and went to his classroom with a smile on his face. 'Here we fucking go...'. Alfred said to himself. Alfred entered his classroom with an apology to the teacher. The teacher, used to him being late nodded and continued to write on the board. Alfred took out his notebook and started to doodle.

He was used to this. The insults, the crying, the sadness, the mock happiness. It's odd to think that Alfred thought this was normal for a person. To constantly feel pain. He thought everyone did...Breakdowns like that happen about every one and a half months. But he cries about every other week. He can't help it. There is too much pain in his heart, if he doesn't vent, he wouldn't have the energy the smile. He needed to smile for other people. He needed to be the hero.

Even if he was a hated one...