Burning Horizon

Burning Horizon; If Only...

"If only..." If only she had.

Two hours had trudged past in total silence; neither I nor Bella had moved an inch from the positions we'd fallen into when Carlisle passed through that door, that one piece of pathetic plastic preventing us from seeing her, our only daughter. The only way I even knew her heart was still beating was that I could hear it, even over all the shouts from the doctors that surrounded her, over all the constant beeps and alerts from the machinery that was fighting to keep her alive. I was so attuned to her heartbeat now, I could pick it out anywhere from the sheer speed it beat at. The noise was staggered, like her heart was stumbling its way through unconsciousness, trying to find a way to pull her out of the dark and back to the blinding lights of the hospital theatre she lay in. Only the presence of Bella besides me on the floor, and her arm that was wound securely around my neck kept me awake in reality, constantly reminding me that this was actually happening. I'd taken to drowning out the voices of the frantic doctors as I had in Volterra, only straining to pick out Renesmee's thoughts when they came, though most of her thoughts were clouded, empty, just darkness. On the rare occasion that I was able to pick our words, which was only when she physically spoke them, they were screams of agony again, piercing my heart time and time again as well as the previously silent air.

The double doors flew open and smacked into the wall behind with a sharp bang. A group of people in dark green overalls, the doctors from before emerged first, followed swiftly by a smaller group of four nurses walking either side of the silver trolley, two had their hands clinging to the side rails, pushing it along the corridor and around the corner. Carlisle stepped out after them, his eyes wide.

"Is she alright?"Bella exclaimed, wrenching me up to standing. Carlisle didn't answer immediately; he just stared after the group of nurses silently. "Carlisle, what's wrong?!"

He took a deep breath and started down the corridor, beckoning subtly with his left hand for us to follow. I picked one word out of his thoughts, the only one that mattered to me right now.

Coma.

Bella tugged me behind her, still completely unaware on her daughter's condition. It was possible to pull out of these things, I'd never studied medical science myself but I knew that. She would get through it; she had to get through it. Carlisle stopped in front of a framed plastic window, turning around to face me slowly. He met my gaze, which must have also been begging at the question that was rampaging around my brain - 'would she wake up from this?' and his response was a reluctant shake of his head.

"How long until the anaesthetic wears off?" Bella whimpered, her face pressed right up against the plastic and her eyes locked on something on the other side.

I couldn't even bring myself to look through, too afraid of what I would see on the other side, how utterly pathetic. I pulled Bella back from the window, spinning her around to face me, so that she could see my face to know I wasn't lying, though lying about this would be sick.

"Bella, she's not asleep because of the anaesthetic." I mumbled, gripping her hands tighter.

"I, I don't understand." She mumbled as her eyebrows burrowed together in her confusion.

I took a deep, long breath. "She's in a coma, Bella."

It took a second for that to sink in but it was obvious when it had. Her expression was so twisted I could of stabbed her a million times with a bread knife from every single angle possible and then set her to burn on a furious fire. I dropped her hands and held out my arms to embrace her but she didn't take it, instead she shoved through the door into the bright hospital room ahead.

"Edward, can I speak to you please." Carlisle said, his voice sounding half dead from the failure of his surgery.

"One minute."