Sister, doll , lost child.

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Rain . Heavy Rain. But he can't hear it hitting the ground or the roof, due his location.
Everyone notices everything but him .
Everyone but him can hear the heavy rain hitting.
All around him , yes everywhere is light , just his room .Darkness.
It's cold .

All I have are my warm clothes , I tent to wear them anytime and the scarf my sister gave me.
Vanunschka ... take it , don't feel cold...
I'm sitting on my bed ,on one single warm cover .I'm locked in this room, not because I've been misbehaving, no.
Most of the people , would probably feel all lonely ,beeing locked , but me ... I don't .
Additionally my dearest sister made me a present !
A simple doll ,she made herself .
I'm holding it tight, it keeps me calm .
Due it's looks , it reminds me of my sister, once we've been on this field trip , a long time ago.
Beautiful sunflowers , like an endless ocean .
She was wearing clothes suitable for agriculture , what was ,what we actually did there .
We had harvested enough food to feed ourselves through the winter and spring .Eventhough it wasn't the easiest ,we managed to survive.
Now it's November again .
Big sister doesn't have much time for me any more .
Each morning she greats me and brings me my meal and medicine.
Medicine ?
You might ask why.But why would you?Who am I even talking to ?Who would even listen ?
I still feel the strong ,enormous pain in my head and all over my back. My arms hurt from the inside , as if the poison would still be running through my veins.
Beaten up ,given some injection.
It were two men.
My sister had enough things to take care of . I hate myself for beeing a burden to her .
Now I am all alone with the doll.
If I could just go back to normal and work and function , I would be able to see her more often.
The only way for me to see her , is through the door lock .
It's not the clearest view ,but at least something.
The past days , the events have been all the same.
Two persons , always at the same time ,when the sun just set ,were coming upstairs in our apartment ,and before letting them in , she always checked twice , whether my rooms door was locked.
The two would enter in the room next door and an argument would start ,while each time they came ,they'd become more violent with their language .
Day for day.

The room itself , on first glance doesn't seem like a child's .
A simple old bed with pillow and cover , an old grey-blue curtain, a bigger window with thin glass ,that didn't keep in the warmth ,neither it kept out the cold. A larger windowsill,made  out of simple ,cold stone.
The room was desolate.
No emotions of joy and happiness to find .
Instead: Silence . Awaiting .

Dark clouds covered the sky , causing more rainfall. Behaving , Ivan took his medicine and hugged the doll tightly ,so that  the feelings like sadness or loneliness couldn't even reach him.His sister was away , not here ,taking care of stuff . She seemed to be so close ,but at the same time so far away , even though all that separated them was a  wall with a locked door in it.
Awaiting. For the sun to go down, for the darkness of the evenings end to rise.
Steps in front of the door , some noices of his sister checking the lock , then an sudden sound of an opening door.
They're here early today...
Ivan slowly left the bed , still holding the doll and keeled down in front of the door , peeking through it's lock.
His sister moved fastly towards the opening door ,he could hear the uneasy feeling of unsafety  in her steps.
Two men entered the door And she stepped back. One of them was holding something in his right hand.
Ivan couldn't really see.
All he could see was his frightened sister and the two men ,grinning in evil .
Suddenly he remembered ... it where them ... the two who did everything to him.
To late to realise .
The two were already invading .

Sudden movements.Too fast for the poor childs eyes to understand.On move and the sister was kneenig on the ground ,while the white haired man held her tight and threatened her with a knife in front of her throat.
"No !" She screamed long , high and whining. Another scream Ivan couldn't even process .
All pitiful .All without the chance of mercy.
And his sister kept screaming for help... but nobody came.
No neighbour could hear them ,as the rain became heavier and its hits louder .The screams stayed unheard , the truth unseen . The child not understanding .It kneeled there ,watching .
"Se-Sestra?"
The white haired man mumbled , even laughed .Laughed at the sister, calling her a dumb whore for even thinking she could have saved everything through conversations .
Meanwhile ,the other man took out a firearm and aimed at her.
"Pity .. so innocent , even worser than this child I should've killed back then ..."
"Now it's enough ,you annoy me , I guess ... you'll be dead now"

The sister screamed , struggled to get out of the grip , but caused the knife to make a small cut on her skin .
Ivan ran back to his bed and jumped on it he sat down , hearing the sounds of the painful screams of his sister.
He just couldn't process it.
One shot fell.
Laughter started .
Another  shot fell.
"To make sure she's dead !"
"She can't be deader than she'd been before !"
Even louder laughter burst out.

The poor child all alone .
He took his last ration of medicine
for today and picked up the doll again. He starred at  it . Minutes .
A scream .
A load scream.
It got even louder .
Filled with despair , hatred , fear ,forlorness ...

The two men kicked the door by side .
No reaction from the child .
It was lost .
Tearing apart the dolls head , ripping it of forcefully .
Biting in the neck to reach his goal quicker .
It ignored the men.
Nothing mattered anymore .
It was a lost child , no chance to become innocent ever again.
No chance of normal behaviour .
Further , it was darkness ,that awaited him.


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