Day at the Galerie

Notes:

Hey everyone! I'm publishing this early because I have zero patience and I'm very proud of this one shot :) It came out a lot longer than I intended but hey, angst is angst. I just tend to get carried away with plotlines, guilty as charged. I hope you enjoy the sensory overload and Irondad fluff! Have fun and stay safe❤🧡💛💚💙💜

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"Alright, Ned, where's the next stop?" Peter lightheartedly asks as he perches on the edge of a building. It's only about 6pm, so they have a lot more time to keep patrolling. They just finished stopping a joy-rider on East 57th Street and they're just getting started.

"Um," the sound of Ned's keyboard clacks over the comms, "police scanners are looking good and there isn't anything on the news." Ned stretches in his wheelie chair before spinning himself in a circle. "Maybe you scared off all the bad guys," he offers optimistically. Peter can hear MJ scoff in the background.

"It's a Saturday evening and it isn't even dark outside yet. Last time I checked, most illegal activity happens after dark," MJ counters. Ned opens his mouth to argue, but Karen speaks before he can.

"Statistically, she is correct. Crimes tend to peak between 9pm and 10pm. Though, the most dangerous day of the week tends to be Friday," she relays in a conversational tone. As the three debate, Peter continues to scan the city below him for anything out of the ordinary.

"I'm just trying to be positive!" Ned defends himself, but doesn't sound particularly convinced with himself.

"There's a difference between being positive and being naïve," MJ states matter-of-factly.

"I'm not being naïve! I'm just trying to be optimistic! That's, like, my job!" As Ned argues, Peter resists the urge to facepalm and instead just shakes his head.

"C'mon, Ned. You know what happens when they team up," Peter tries to warn, but it's already too late.

"The definition of naïve is to 'show a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgment' whereas the definition of optimism is 'hopefulness and confidence about the future.' According to these and your lack of knowledge concerning crime rate statistics, you tend to lean towards naïveté." Ned gawks at Karen's oh-so-effortless explanation while MJ smirks triumphantly.

"See," MJ adds to get her point across. Peter can't help but chuckle, which instantly causes Ned to pout.

"Peter," Ned whines, "Karen's picking sides again!"

"You're on your own, man. I learned a long time ago not to argue with MJ." Peter shivers at the thought of his first and only debate with MJ. No way does he want a repeat of last time, and she's the head of Decathlon for a reason.

"What?! But I'm your Guy in the Chair! We have each other's backs and stuff!" As Ned rambles, MJ checks social media platforms for any possible fights or public disturbances.

"You're trying to argue with an incredibly intelligent User Interface built by the genius Tony Stark and MJ who knows basically all there is to know about, like, everything. Sometimes, you gotta pick your battles." Peter shrugs his shoulders as he starts to construct a hammock between two buildings with his webs. Ned narrows his eyes in suspicion.

"That sounds a lot like something MJ would say," he points out. Peter freezes and gulps.

"Well, I mean, uh, who knows. Like, maybe it does, but she says a lot of wise stuff, y'know? So it's, it's not like I got it from her specifically." Peter rambles out his excuses, then clears his throat awkwardly. Luckily, MJ saves him, albeit unintentionally.