Out of Time || j.m.

Chapter 18

She nodded. "Kind of nervous to do the video if I'm being honest though."

"Don't worry," I reassured her, "you'll be fine."

Erin bit her lip, nodding again and sat down as I got my laptop out and logged onto YouTube. "Ready?"

"Ready," Erin said, and I held her hand as I pressed record.

"Hey everyone. It's been awhile since I've talked to you guys. And so much has happened, for better or for worse, I'm guessing you know which," I said sadly, and then removed my beanie from my head.

"So my hair's gone now. I was afraid to wash it, let alone touch it for so long, and I guess it wouldn't have mattered anyways. It all just fell out. But I guess it's just another reason for me to prove myself, for me to fight harder for myself. Erin's helped a lot with that," I said, giving Erin's hand a gentle squeeze, smiling softly at her.

"You still look great with or without your hair," Erin said, smiling softly.

I grinned at her, kissing her temple softly before resting my forehead against hers for a moment, pulling away soon after. "She's been my inspiration, my rock. I don't know what I would do without her," I smiled, making Erin blush.

"She's actually the source of one of the songs my mate Tom and I wrote. She's the reason why we wrote it, and I don't know if you all would mind, but I'd like to sing, for her and for you because I'm not quite sure how else to show a thank you. I'm not exactly talented or eloquent with words, so I guess a song would have to be it."

I racked my brain for the memory of the beat, eventually finding it and giving Erin a smile. I took a breath and began singing.

"Words travel fast. So you spend all your time in your head. What's the point in that? 'Cause words never last. What you say now is not what you said. And I'm okay with that."

I took Erin's hand, giving it a gentle squeeze as I looked into her eyes, smiling.

"You're keeping yourself tied up. So you won't let me down. Didn't you ever think, just maybe. I'll understand you. Just give me the chance to. Love you more than you'll ever know. Even if it means I gotta let you go... With or without me. Baby you should be happy. If you're heading down another road. Don't you leave me with nowhere to go. Don't let me be the last to know, yeah. Don't let me be the last to know."

Erin's eyes were glistening; a teary shine had been been created as she watched me sing.

"You take all I have. Still I pour you a half-empty glass. What's the point in that? And all I ever asked. Is that you tell me when it's not enough. 'Cause if it's real love."

"I'll understand you. Just give me the chance to. Love you more than you'll ever know. Even if it means I gotta let you go... With or without me. Baby you should be happy. If you're heading down another road. Don't you leave me with nowhere to go. Don't let me be the last to know."

I took a deep breath. This was meant to be Nathan's part, as he was actually a singer and had amazing vocals, so it was a bit rough for me.

"And maybe you'll find what you really wanted. 'Cause what you left behind and all your dreams are haunted. Maybe I'll move on, or maybe I'll just stay. Either way. I hope you'll understand me. If I say we can't be. So if you wanna go. I want you to know."

"I'll understand you. Just give me the chance to. Love you more than you'll ever know. Even if it means I gotta let you go... With or without me. Baby you should be happy. If you're heading down another road. Don't you leave me with nowhere to go. Don't let me be the last to know, yeah. Don't let me be the last to know. Don't let me be the last to know."