The Other Side Of Fear[1]

Chapter 17

'Well...that's why we want to make sure nothing is going on with you and him,' Dad said, awkwardly.

'Are you kidding me?' I scoffed.

First Archie, now my parents. Why couldn't people just accept that I didn't want to be a total bitch to Cal just because the rest of the town did. It didn't mean I was fucking him!

'We forbid you to see him,' Dad said.

'Oh okay,' I let out a sarcastic laugh. 'You can't forbid me to see people.'

'He is bad news and we want you to stay away from him,' Mom said. 'No more riding on the back of his motorcycle. No more hanging in the woods at the waterfall. No more situations that involve associating with him or him bringing you home.'

'Should I quit my job too?' I asked, sarcastically. 'Because he comes in there almost every day for supplies.'

'No,' Dad said. 'The job can stay. You'll be professional at work and stay away from him outside of it.'

'I don't go near him anyway Dad,' I said. 'I am not friends with Cal. We don't see each other regularly.'

'So then there's no problem?' Dad looked at me closely.

'No,' I said, biting my tongue. 'No problem at all.'

'Okay,' he nodded. 'Go to bed.'

I stood to my feet and left the room without another glance at them. I mean, it was true, I didn't associate with Cal; we weren't friends. In fact, I had planned on avoiding him anyway to stop things getting worse between Archie and I. However, now that Archie had totally proven to me how much of a dick he really was, and now that Cal had saved my ass once again, I was furious that they would even have the nerve to forbid me to see him. It wasn't that I wanted to see him, but the feeling of all of these people trying to stop me from seeing him when everything between us was totally innocent was making me angry.

What was going on between Cal and I was nothing. It was nothing like what my parents and Archie seemed to think it was. They were thinking something romantic was going on between Cal and I. That was crazy talk. In what world would I ever find myself in a situation like that with a guy like Cal Lakey?

...

I continued through school that week as planned and really forced myself to focus on my studies. Archie approached me more or less straight away the next day and acted like nothing had even happened all morning. His arm draped around my shoulders as we walked through the halls and he smiled and nodded and high-fived people we passed and to the rest of the student body, our relationship looked completely normal. My feelings of warmth and serenity and excitement were gone. These feelings were now replaced with anxiety and anger and sadness. This was not the boy who had pursued me that day in biology class. This was not the boy who took me on the most perfect first date at the shitty bar. This was not the boy who allowed me to feel pure freedom as I soared through the trees on our second date. This boy had began to change.

I had noticed the subtle signs, but to me they were minor. Now, I realised what this was. I felt controlled. I felt like no matter what I said to Archie to make him see what he did wrong, he could always find the words to turn it around. I felt like I couldn't get out of this because no matter what I said to him, whatever he said to me made me somehow see things his way and I found myself feeling for him again. I felt dull inside. I wanted to run away and yet at the same time but I felt the need to stay with him. I constantly told myself I was overthinking and that all of the girls here would kill to be with him. So, I stayed. I also stayed quiet and found myself playing the happy girlfriend role as much as something deep down inside me was telling me that something here was not right.