In This Love

How Do We Keep Us Together

With all of the questions that mocked me in my sleep, mocked when I thought about him that could only be answered by Rhys himself.

I needed the answers, even though it would hurt me if I don't get the ones I want.

I still needed them to ease the ache in my chest that has decided to stay for the longest time.

"Why don't you go take a shower and freshen up. Come back and we'll have dinner. Then we can discuss who missed the other more later" my voice was muffled but I was close to his ear so I knew he heard me.

"Let's stay like this for ever" he replied like that instead.

Forever is what I want to talk to you about.

I needed a bit space to figure how to talk it out with him even if I was left alone for a couple of minutes.

"No you stink. Go take a shower, we can always cuddle later" I said as I pushed myself away from him, faking disgust as I moved away.

Rhys crossed his arms as he lay there, I got up from the couch and walked to the kitchen. Later I heard him let out a sigh and getting up.

Until then, I could think.

It was like a thing of ours that whenever we ate our dinner, we didn't talk to each other at all.

I was standing by the window looking at the buildings that were so far away from our home, they shone like stars. How could I ever move on from this?

Moments later, I heard faint steps come behind me, an arm wrapped around my waist as they pulled me close to their chest. A glass of red wine came in front of me, I gladly took it from his hand. Rhys wrapped his other arm around me as well.

"This is perfect" I heard him say it as he gave my hand a little squeeze.

I hummed and let my head fall backwards on his shoulder. I closed my eyes and felt the calmness around me.

All of this was perfect, he was right about that. Though this perfection had it's own imperfections but this was ours.

"How's work these days?" I asked adjusting myself in his arms. For a fraction of a second I felt him tense up behind me but it was gone as he let out a sigh.

"I still can't find the leak in our company" Rhys succinctly said not wanting to get into a topic like that.

"You're Rhys Holt. You'll find them" I reassured as I walked out of his embrace and came back to the couch. With a knot in my chest, it became unfathomable to me that how was I supposed to ask him.

Soon after finishing his glass of scotch, he came back to the couch and sat next to me. Both of our legs were sprawled over the coffee table as we star gazed through the comfort of our home.

"I need to talk to you" I said as I sat up straight, leaning back to the other side of the couch so that I was facing him. My heart thundered against my ribs as nervousness rose up like bile.

Rhys studied me with his eyes, I was guarded enough to not let him know that I was hiding something. I just let him see that I was bothered by what I wanted to talk to him about. Which was true. I was incredibly bothered.

He gave me his permission to speak by simply nodding. Rhys himself was visibly uncomfortable by what I was about to tell him.

"What do you think the future holds for us?" I asked in a strong voice, I couldn't let him see that I was weak in any way. That he knew that I could take in anything he would say to me.

Rhys

"What do you think the future holds for us?" She asked making everything inside of me freeze. By the look on her face it told me that she was ready for any onslaught of words I would say.