I Am Strong

2. It'll Be Okay...Eventually

After being poked and prodded, Olivia was brought back to her hospital room and with help from a nurse, she got back into the bed and laid back against the pillows. She was still in shock. The man who was supposed to protect her, aside for her partner, had raped her. She was starting to think that maybe there wasn't a real case that she needed to investigate after all; that maybe he brought her out there under the guise of an undercover operation just to get away with it.

And out of their jurisdiction so he couldn't be charged.

Her thoughts started to wander and she got a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach when there was a knock on her hospital room door; thinking it was Porter.

"Who is it?" She asked timidly.

"It's Don, Liv." Cragen spoke gently through the door so he wouldn't scare her. He couldn't imagine how she was feeling right now.

"Come in." She replied and he walked in with a small, sad smile on his face.

"Hey," he said softly as he sat in the chair next to her bed.

"Hey," she replied as she tried to hold in her tears.

When he gently held his arms out, she couldn't hold her emotions in any longer. As soon as his arms wrapped around her, she started sobbing into his chest. She always tried to be tough around her captain and the rest of the squad. Not letting her emotions get the best of her but this was different. They were alone. She could let her guard down.

They pulled back from the hug after a few minutes and cleared their throats, reeling in their emotions. Knowing that Cragen wouldn't want to outright ask what happened, Olivia took a deep breath and relayed everything that had happened.

Once she finished telling him how Porter would make comments about her figure and other suggestive remarks, she was in tears once again but not like before. She was proud of herself for getting through it without having another breakdown. She took a sip of water that was sitting on the table and took a deep breath. "So, do you know where he is?" She asked softly, trying to keep the anger out of her voice.

"He's claiming that someone else raped you and that he found the guy who did it and he was going to charge him with it once you got out of the hospital. But after everything you just told me, the way he's been acting, it all makes sense. Once the DNA comes back, Porter's screwed." Cragen replied.

"Who's the guy he's setting up?" Olivia asked and once Cragen showed her the picture of the man, she shook her head. "I've never seen him before." She said.

"Exactly. Porter knows we can't charge the guy and he knows he's guilty. I had Munch and Fin stall his credit cards and passport just in case he decides to run. If he does decide to run and somehow finds a way to pay for it, I have the airports on alert to bring him to our squad room once he lands. There's no way he's getting away with this, Liv. I promise, the son-of-a-bitch is gonna pay for what he did to you." Cragen said with a fierce look in his eyes, like he was protecting his child. In a way, he was. He always felt like Munch, Fin, Olivia and Elliot were his children and they felt "grounded" if they got in trouble with him.

"Does...does Elliot know?" Olivia asked nervously as she looked down at her hands, small tears in her eyes.

"No. I knew that if I told him, he would fly out here and strangle Porter with his bare hands and I want Porter to rot in jail for what he did. Plus, I don't think we'd have enough money to pay for his bail." Cragen tried to joke and Olivia chuckled lightly.

"How can we charge him though? It's a jurisdictional issue..." she tried to say but Cragen cut her off.

"I knew that would be an issue and Novak already talked to a judge and was able to have the case brought to New York." Cragen replied.

Olivia took a deep breath and nodded. "Well, the doctor said I'm good to go home. Even though I only have minor injuries, she told me to take it easy for a while," she paused for a moment then continued, "and to see a therapist." She knew her captain had a smirk on his face. She was never one to ask for help, let alone see someone if she had a problem. The only time she saw a therapist was when it was mandatory for her job. But she knew in order to heal, she needed to process what happened and move on in a healthy way.

"I was going to suggest going to see someone but since it's doctor's orders, you can't really ignore it." Cragen said with a light smile.

Olivia smiled back and rolled her eyes slightly; she knew he was right. "So, what happens now? Can I get out of here?" She asked with a light smirk and Cragen chuckled.

He knew she hated hospitals and was itching to get out of there and go home even though she had a long road ahead of her once she arrived home. "I'll get the doctor so you can sign your discharge papers and we can go back to your alias's apartment so you can get your stuff. Porter isn't there; when he called me, he said he was at the station trying to pin the assault on the other guy and then he'll be flying back to New York with him so we won't be running into him. Even if he does try to fly back there anyway, once he gets to New York he won't get very far." He patted her hand lightly and went to get the doctor, leaving Olivia to change into her clothes.

Once he came back with the doctor, Olivia signed the discharge papers and she and Cragen went back to her alias's apartment to grab her clothes. They got everything she needed and headed straight for the airport to go back to New York. She zoned out on the plane, trying to block out what she had just been through. Instead, her thoughts once again, turned to her partner. She hoped he would be happy to see her. Well, maybe not happy but at least relieved that she was okay. Cragen said he didn't tell Elliot what happened and she didn't want anyone to tell him until she had the chance. She just hoped he wouldn't try and harm Porter. Like Cragen, she wanted him to rot in prison for the rest of his life.

Before she knew it, the plane had landed and they grabbed a cab once they made it outside. "Do you wanna go to your apartment and change then go to the precinct? Your statement has to go on record, you know the drill." Cragen said regretfully.

"Yeah, I think I might go back to my apartment first and take a shower. I feel..." Olivia couldn't finish her sentence as fresh tears filled her eyes and she shook her head.

"Whatever you need, Liv. I'm here for ya. And I'm sorry." Cragen said with a sad smile and once he told the cab driver the address to her apartment, she relaxed into the seat of the cab and took a deep breath.

She could do this. She just needed to hold on for a little bit longer and believe that everything would be okay in the end. It had to be.