Rhys James Holt, didn't know that love could be so close to him and yet he can't identify it as his mind is clouded by the "hate" he feels for his wife that he didn't chose.
Avery Stark, now Holt didn't want to be his wife either. But what happens w...
It can get better, if you have someone to take the pain away. When Rhys said that I shouldn't care what his mother said or what my parents did. He included himself too.
In this moment, with him next to me. His opinion matters too. Maybe his opinion matters the most.
Will I lose this too? Will I lose him?
Of course I will. Once the year ends we are going on our own way.
Why does my mind have to think of the worst things that make me sad although I already am in so much pain?
"Guys, let's go out" I heard Alex say snapping the silence around me, I looked at Sarah who was silently asking for permission.
All three pair of eyes were on me.
I simply shrugged "I just want to stay here, you all can go if you want" Sarah took and irritated sigh, using the floor to get herself up. She walked towards me and took my hands in hers.
"I know it's to early for us to say this" she seemed hesitant "You and I would both hate to treat you as some sick grenade where we have to be careful to say and do things around before you burst into flames and we can't find you"
She played with my hair and tried to seem as calm as she could "Then again, we have to treat you like one for sometime until you're okay. Until, we fully know that you are alright why? We won't give up on you. We don't care if we have to pamper you and shower you with support cause that is why everyone needs friends"
"Sometimes, someone wants to be left alone" was all I said because that is what I felt in that time.
"True that" she agreed but there was something else hidden in that face "but, if I'm being honest, when you are alone you seem to lose a part of yourself. Especially you Avery. You're not the same person I met in high school. You're not the same person after your accident. You're not the same person after getting married and you won't certainly be the same person after the next big thing that happens to you. You will say that its maturity but shutting people out isn't mature. Don't shut us out. Don't shut me out. Please" a tear left her eye and I hugged her close.
She was right. She was so right.
"I'm so sorry" I said, I shouldn't shut her out. I shouldn't make this hard for her than it already is.
I did feel like I was being eaten alive, to the point where you cry. But there were tears left to cry.
My eyes were dry.
My heart was dryer.
I unwrapped my arms around her and got up from the couch, though she was right but in the moment I still didn't feel like going outside. It was depression I knew it. But it will take time. Time heals all.
"I can't go out. I'm not ready. But we can't go out in the garden for some fresh air" I said as I started to walk towards my room. I heard footsteps behind me when I entered the room. The person, closed the door behind us.
I was standing at the foot of my bed, not knowing what to do.
"I know you said sorry to Sarah just for it wouldn't hurt her more" Rhys said and I turned around.
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"Am I that transparent?" I say as I sit down on the bed. He walked towards me and sat down on the floor.
"She didn't see it. Alex didn't see it. I saw it" he looked.....tired. Exhausted. In pain. Why was he in pain?
Was it the first time that I was noticing those lines on his forehead. Where those there before? Or did his eyes have a little green in them before, if you took out the pain they held. They would look reborn.
"Your eyes have green in them" I said, trying to brush away the fact that he saw what I did back there.
"I know. Thanks for noticing" he knew that I was trying to change the topic. Keeping my voice as emotionless as possible, just like him I said,
"It's not a compliment. I'm just saying" he shrugged as if he didn't care.
"Even though you said that you'll go the the garden just to make it easy for her. Pretending to be okay will only make it worse for your heart, mind, body and soul" he got up from the carpet and went into my closet.
A minute passed and Rhys came out with my shoes in his hands.
"Baby Cassian would love to go out. If you don't want to do it for Sarah. Do it for him" he said with a small smile on his face.
"No way to get out of this. Huh?" I said hoping that he understood that deeper meaning.
He did. I saw it in that sad smile of his.
"You will. One day. You will" he said helding out a hand for me.
A/N: Ididn't know what to write next. Dont know if it's good. But it will get better, I promise.
