"Who let you in here?" I questioned Don when I saw him stretched across the hotel room bed after I exited the shower. "Got a new key from the front desk you know, since I'm your husband and all. Cost me seventy five dollars though." He shrugged as though it was nothing. "Stop saying that. You're not my husband and you're not my soon to be husband. If they were smart then they would see that our last names don't match." "Not all married women change their name." He said. I sighed while handing him my lotion. "Can you do my back?" He took the lotion from me and I turned my back to him. "Then what am I?" He wanted to know. "My boyfriend and baby's father." I heard him smack his lips. It wasn't like I was lying. That's exactly what he was.
"Man, Britni go on with that." He pushed me away letting me know he was finished massaging the lotion into my skin. "Go on with what? Me having an issue with just being boyfriend and girlfriend and wanting to be more than your girlfriend? If this was a few months back when I was brushing the topic of marriage off with you, you would've been down my fucking throat. Adonis, we've been through hell and high waters with each other. We have a kid and I want him to grow up with both of his parents in the same household. Together, one union, married. I know what I want, who I want and that what and who is you. If you can't give me that one last thing that I want with you and for my vision to be completed then-" I said before he cut me off.
"Then what B, what? You saying this like I'm about to receive an ultimatum or some shit." He snapped standing up, towering over my frame. "I know you better sit your ass down and lower your voice talking to me like that. I'm not yelling at you so don't yell at me. Talk to me like you have sense before the cops bust back up in here and this time Las Vegas Police Department will be taking my ass down to the jail house. And if I am going to give you an ultimatum I really wonder if you'll follow through and choose the right thing." I said before slipping on some pajama shorts and a beater to sleep in. "Well?" Don spoke making me look up. "Well what?" "The choices, what are they?"
I just looked at him and thought about if I really needed to go there. I did but at the same time I didn't want to. He knew what was up and if I needed to say it then it could only mean that he wanted to hear it just to confirm. Almost two years and we come to this block. We grew together and we grew separately, somewhat going into different directions on the separate end. I wasn't trying to be a common law wife to him because in my eyes that was less than a girlfriend. It was either I became his wife by a judge or pastor or I wouldn't be anything at all. At any point in time he could up and leave me to be alone and what we had would just become a memory. Didn't he love me and want to spend his life with me the way that I did with him?
I blew out the breath that I was holding in and moved to stand in front of him on the bed. Don looked up at me with a nervous look washing over his face and his hand crept to the back of his neck. Gently, I pulled his hand from his neck and held it in mine and began rubbing my thumb across the back of it. It was funny how just a hour ago I was angry with him and wanted to kill him and now I just wanted to love him in every way imaginable. This was my heart and I don't think that he even knew it.
"Don't take it personal- what I'm going to say. I just feel like I need to do and say this for both you and I, mostly for me. I take too much shit from you and let you get away with things easily. I don't make you work for it like we both know you should. You make me work for shit though and I do it with no problem and to make you happy. Making you happy makes me feel good inside, to know that I can put a smile on my man's face. I love you, Adonis. I do, almost more than I love myself. It will never be more than because I will always love myself first. You and our son next. I need more from you- more time, love, fun, memorable moments, us building together, help with our son and mostly I need to be more than just the girl you've been dating for two years. After a lot of thinking, I've got it figured out. I haven't required this commitment of marriage like I should have back then. That's because I was afraid. I'm not afraid anymore and I am now requiring this step forward to our future. Just last night you said you would do anything to make me, the number one lady in your life happy. Six months is what I'm giving you. Once the six months are up and we aren't moving towards getting married or even a ring, that will tell and show me how serious you are about us, me and our family....and that may or may not be the end. And you will have helped me make a decision." I said softly before taking my hand and wiping the tear sliding down my face. Don snatched his hand from my own.
Forty Seven
Start from the beginning
