The STD Trace

25. Why? Why? Why to the Freaking Why?

“What’s the problem?”

I ran a hand through my blonde waves, my chest heaving. “I’m going home, nothing is wrong, Winston.”

“Hannah, I know you.”

I spun around to face him. “You know me? If you knew me you’d know that I’m not okay and I just want to talk to you, I want you to understand. I don’t want you to throw up your hands just so that we can come to an agreement. What the hell, Winston? When do you ever surrender? What is wrong with you?”

“What is wrong with me? God, I haven’t talked to you in a while and you’re like going batshit crazy on me!”

“In a while? Pfft, try a month, Winston.” I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter. I hope your grandma gets better, Winston. I have to go.”

“Hannah, please, what is wrong with you?”

I closed my eyes and then started laughing. “Out of all things, I thought I at least still had you. Lucas isn’t my full brother. Turns out that mommy had an affair while she was with dad and Lucas has another daddy.” I smiled sardonically.

Winston frowned and then he pulled me into his warm embrace. This was what I had been missing all along. This was what I needed. “He still loves you, Hannah. It doesn’t change a damn thing.” He stroked my hair.

I sighed. “It still hurts.”

“Don’t shut out your family, Hannah. Look at me,” he ordered. I looked up at him. “Families have issues, they all do, and only you can decided whether or not you will let them rule your life or not.”

I smiled. That’s what I have been missing, his words of wisdom, his sweet encouragements. “I’ve missed you,” I breathed, kissing his lips lightly.

He smiled at me, cupping my face in his hands. “I have missed you too.” He kissed me back.

“I don’t believe you,” I teased.

He growled. “Do I need to show you how much?”

“I think you do.” I blinked up at him.

He raised an eyebrow and grabbed my hand, towing me outside to his car. He opened the car door and threw me down onto the backseat, crawling on top of me. “I’ve missed you…” He planted a kiss on my throat. “So very…” He kissed my collarbone. “Very…” He kissed my chest, yanking my shirt aside. “Very…” He licked a trail back up to my lips, biting my bottom lip. “Much.” He gave me a sweet peck.

Breathless, I grabbed his face in my hands and flipped us over so that I was on top. “I’ve missed you way…” I kissed his jaw and he groaned. “Way…” I kissed his throat. “Way…” I slipped my hands up his shirt and over his abs. “Way more…” I kissed his lips. “Then you can ever imagine.” I poked his nose.

“You always cheat, Hannah.” He sat up, pulling me into his lap and nibbled at my left ear. I moaned.

“And you always tease.” I clutched my hands in his hair.

“Well…you have me there.” I laughed as his phone rang. “Hold on.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket and my good mood slipped right down the drain. “Yes? Crap, I’m sorry—I’ll be there in like ten. Yes, I promise. Okay, bye.” He hung up and opened his mouth to speak.

“It’s okay, I know, you’re busy, you have to go.” I crawled off his lap and out of the car. He crawled after me.

“Hannah, I’m sorry. I want to, I want to spend time with you, but—”

“I understand, Winston, you are busy.” I gave him the best smile I could muster, even though my insides were boiling over.

“I’ll call you, okay?” He smiled.