Secret Love

Chapter 4

After taking a few days to myself to think about my feelings, I knew that if Jack was gonna be hooking up with other girls, if he was gonna be acting the way he was acting, I couldn't keep doing this anymore. I was hurting to much inside. I knew I had to talk to Jack, tell him how I felt and that I needed something more. If he didn't feel the same then so be it but I couldn't continue doing this knowing that deep down I was just hurting. It was a Friday afternoon, I had been in my room all morning, alone with my thoughts, when I decided I had to talk to Gilinsky. I didn't even bother to change out of my sweatpants and t-shirt. I put on my shoes, grabbed my car keys and called out to my brother, who was the only one home, that I was heading over to Megan's house. I don't know how Jack hasn't managed to find out about my "relationship" with his best friend, but he hasn't. Jack had no idea I was coming over, I thought I would pay him a surprise visit, and to my surprise when I pulled up to his house, his car was the only one in the driveway, which meant he was alone. Perfect. I put my car in park, got out and made my way up to his front door and ringing the door bell. I heard him on the phone with someone, saying "yeah I gotta go someone is here" before opening the door to find me.

(Gilinsky) "Emma? What are you doing here?"

(Me) "We need to talk."

He let me inside and we sat down on the couch. I could tell by the look on his face that he was a bit concerned by what I had to say.

(Gilinsky) "What's up?"

There's no going back now E. Just go for it.

(Me) "Jack I can't do this anymore. Knowing that you're hooking up with other girls hurts more than you think it would and it hurts because I like you so much to the point where I feel like I'm in love with you. I need more than what we have. I need to know I mean more than just sex to you. I need to know that I'm yours and only yours and you're mine and only mine. I don't want to share you anymore and if you don't have the same feelings for me then that's fine but I just can't keep doing this."

Jack just stared at me. I don't know what he was thinking but that felt so good to get off my chest. After a few minutes, Jack still hadn't said anything.

(Me) "Well say something."

(Gilinsky) "I like you too. I fell so hard for you. I tried to push the feelings away because I didn't think a relationship would work but nothing worked. I like you so much. I want to be with you so bad."

Instead of responding, I moved closer to Jack, and I pressed my lips against his as my way of telling him that I wanted to be with him too. We kissed for a few minutes before Jack pulled away.

(Gilinsky) "What about your brother?"

(Me) "Forget my brother. We've done a good job at sneaking around so far haven't we? It can't be that much harder with a real relationship."

(Gilinsky) "So it's official?"

(Me) "Only if you want it to be"

(Gilinsky) "Oh I want it to be."

Without another word, Jack pressed his lips against mine again. I smiled against his kiss knowing that he was officially mine and I didn't have to worry about sharing him anymore, I knew he was mine and only mine and I was his and only his. I was, hopefully, the only girl he would be with and that made me happy. I didn't care about my brother's stupid rule anymore, I just wanted to be happy and being with G is what made me happy. So far we've done a good job sneaking around without getting caught, how much harder can it be with a real relationship? It's only temporary anyway, until we find the right time to tell Jack of course. I don't know how long we had been kissing at this point, I was lost in my thoughts, but I pulled away from Jack, a smile still on my face.

(Gilinsky) "You deserve a proper first date."

(Me) "I do? What does that proper first date consist of?"

(Gilinsky) "Whatever you're idea of an amazing first date would be."

(Me) "How about a nice, casual dinner, wherever you want to go, then we go walk around down town, maybe stop in a few stores and see what's new, and end the night with movies and cuddles."

(Gilinsky) "That sounds perfect to me. Tomorrow, 12 pm, meet me here. I would come pick you up –"

(Me) "I know. I know. It's ok. Don't worry about it. I'll be here, right on time."

Nothing was said but Jack smiled. I love his smile. Something about it can warm your heart and turn you on all at the same time.

(Gilinsky) "I think I know the perfect way to seal this deal."

(Me) "Oh you do?"

I didn't have time to question him any further. Jack grabbed my hand and pulled my off the couch, again pressing his lips to mine. As if it were natural, we started making our way over to the stairs. Jack picked me up and carried me up to his room, never once breaking the kiss, the kiss getting more and more heated as time went on. We made it up to his room, Jack shut his door even though no one was home and pinned me against it. I didn't think the kiss could be any more intense at this point. Jack gently sat me on his bed, breaking the kiss for only a short second to remove my shirt, then his. Things kept getting more and more heated by the second and there was only one way to seal the deal, our favorite way.