Family Reunion

Hurt

     "...I understand." Joxter sighed, pulling the pipe from his teeth and into his paw.

     "Do you know how hard it was to not have you there? Do you know how hard it was to understand that you would never come back? Mother was devastated, she became so much more forgetful than usual. We thought you were dead." Snufkin's voice cracked, and his paws balled into tight fists.

"Snufkin-"

     "We really thought you were dead. Mother must have thought those people killed you. She got so forgetful and distressed that I would go hungry sometimes because she forgot to feed me! I felt invisible! As if not having one parent around wasn't enough, it almost felt like I lost my mother too!"

Joxter opened his mouth to speak, but he snapped his lips closed when he heard Snufkin sniffle. Oh lord, he was crying. He made his son cry.

     "I would have still left home to travel if you were there, I'd still be on my own. But it would have been nice to have a father there, knowing that no matter where he was and where I was I could rely on if I needed advice. I had to find out for myself what I could eat out in the woods. I got sick from eating berries and rashes from plants that I had no idea were harmful. I had to go through growing up without a dad to tell me that what was happening to my body was normal! I was changing so much that it scared me! You weren't there when I really needed you! Do you understand that?! You left me!!"

     Snufkin's head shot up, revealing gritted teeth and tears welled up in his eyes. Joxter's eyes widened and his mouth was agape. But no words could come out.

     Snufkin wept. He buried his face into his paws and cried. Without a word, Joxter stood up and walked around the fire pit. He sat down beside Snufkin, drawing his knees to his chest.

     "...I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry." Joxter's voice wobbled, he sounded like he was on the verge of sobbing himself. "I know... I know sorry will never be enough. Nothing will ever be enough to make up for this. I have so much to apologize for... I really messed up."

     Snufkin's cries faded out, and he did his best to collect himself. He rubbed at his eyes and cheeks, attempting to wipe away his tears. But his eyes were sunken in and puffy, and his face was flushed pink.

     "I've been a lousy father, I-I know. If you can even call me a father at all" Joxter sighed, turning his head to look at his son. "I wasn't there for you. I wasn't there and I was fully aware that it must have hurt you. And I was right... I'm so sorry. But...that's why I'm glad I found you, Snufkin. So I can try my best to make things right."

     Snufkin turned to look at Joxter.

     "I know you'll be mad, probably for the rest of your life. But... I want to try to be better. I want to be there for you. My one and only little boy. Though, you're not so little any more." Joxter sniffled. "I wasn't there for you...but I want to be there for you now. I want to make things better. You have your own life now...but I want to do my best to be part of it. I love you, Snufkin. I love you so much. I want to be there for you from now on... will you let me try?"

     It was silent again. Only for a moment though, but for them, it felt like forever. Snufkin was quiet, as if he was searching in his mind on what to do. If he could find it in his heart to give Joxter a chance. He hesitated...but within a couple seconds he scared Joxter out of his skin when he threw his arms around him in a tight hug. He cried into Joxter's shoulder, clenching at his father's coat tightly.

"I'd like that papa...I would really like that."

     Joxter's flood gates burst at that very second. Papa. He had longed to hear his little boy call him that again after so many long years. It wasn't that tiny quiet voice anymore, but it was still him. His little Snufkin. He broke down into tears, melting into the embrace. He was shaking slightly as he rubbed an arm down Snufkin's back.

     Joxter was going to try. He was going to be there for his son

And if that meant going to hell and back for Snufkin, his little boy, he was gonna do it.