THE DIARY

OPINION

Dylan, my twin brother is Dad's favourite and I have known this for as long as I could talk or walk or I'm just exaggerating. He smiles more at him and he pats him on the back more than me. I am not paranoid and I am not delusional; I know these things... I just know.

At the dinner table Dad tends to ask him more questions than me about school. He also navigates through his opinions more strongly.
" Oh really? "
" How did they make you feel? "
" Is that how you think that should be? "
" You're so critical "

I guess this is because Dylan gives more elaborate answers than mine which makes him the most obvious choice for questioning and besides Dylan is always guaranteed to agree and to support Dad in this opinions.
Even with the most radical, Nazist ideas; Dylan laughs and agrees. I mean I am at shock each day. It is an unsolved mystery to me because I am truly different from all that. When I am asked I like to give my opinion, boldly and for a very long time I have not been giving opinions for that matter. My opinions do not usually fall right with Dad so I guess that is why he stopped inquiring.

I used to get so jealous when they laughed at an inside joke that I could not understand or when Dad went out of his way to compliment Dylan for his smooth English speaking skills and his organisation of ideas in English. You see, I had difficulty growing up speaking properly in Swahili and so when it came to English I was making tongue twisters.
Why does he have to be so freaking brilliant all the time?
I have had my fair share of headaches thinking of that question but in the end I became satisfied with my position in this family, a black sheep.

This evening I was asked a question again. A question about something I was deliberating for such a long time. It was about the benefits of corporal punishment in a child's growth.
"As a secondary school, shaping discipline should be prime after academic excellence! Dylan, I tell you back in the old days the cane was the law. One had to get one for one to be straight! " Dad was pretty serious staring at his food.

" Really Dad? Was grandpa that harsh? " Dylan acts as if he is at a complete loss of words.

" My old man was the warden himself. He was so stern with everything. He did not want me and my sisters growing soft and weak so he disciplined us a lot. "

I have heard this story before, so many times. I have heard stories about the different colours of the cane my Dad was beat with. The miles and miles he had to get to school. In the past I used to marvel at the struggle he had to endure until it became a weapon to shoot us down, to shoot me down. I respect his hustle but I have my own opinions about how things should be in play at this time of the century. I do not want to emulate the past. I had never said this to anyone even him and I would have liked to keep it that way until...

" A cane has helped you Amon hasn't it?" Dad asks me, seriously.

"That would be an overstatement Dad!" I say playing with my fork.

"An overstatement? Are you trying to be smart with fancy English words? "

" No, on the contrary. I am trying to be progressive. I do not prefer a cane to any kind of punishment." I am more determined now.

" Aaah. This is a disadvantage of being so weak! You hear Dylan? Teach your brother a thing or two." Dad laments in a loud voice.

"Okay Dad." My brother says nodding his head.

" Up to date statistics have shown that corporal punishment doesn't develop a child's mindset and perception over their environment. It deteriorates growth of the mind." I take this as my time to make my argument.

" What are you saying Amon. Everyone needs a tough hand to govern their decisions. Someone is bound to make the same mistakes If they know no repercussions, no higher hand will hold them accountable." My brother battles me.

" So you mean that adults should have their parents beat them also? " This was a stupid argument but worth making.

" Not necessarily, there is jail for that! But a child only has their parents. I see every Importance of strict reprimand in a child's growth. Look at us, we turned out alright! "

" I did not turn out alright! "

"Well I did."

"Exactly! Everyone is different. You can't use the same method to straighten up values. It will work for some specimen but not every specimen. You can't be giving the same prescription for everyone with a different disease? Some children are more sensitive and closed in. Corporal punishment only forces them to close in more. To become scared, detached and untrusting. How does this help everyone? "

"Son! " My Dad intervenes, " Do you see Mama Ruth's children they are hooligans because she was reluctant to discipline them. I am glad I took it into practice, straightening you and your brother."

" A child's reaction to corporal punishment is entirely choice Dad. They can choose to straighten up or completely stray away more. It doesn't mean that If you beat a child they'll listen. It'll just make them question a lot of things. It doesn't improve filial relationships father! I do not want to beat my children! "

"Amon, even the Bible encourages this practice. We are christians right? " My brother was at it again.

"The Bible?..." I try to say disapprovingly.

" I think this is enough for one night. I want everyone to go bed now. I do not want another opinion about this." My dad closes off the argument.