I sleep on the bottom of a Bunk bed that sakes sometimes. Most people wouldn't even notice the slight movements it makes, weather they were moving around or not. But I am not like most people and over the past few months I've noticed my body overreacting to the smallest things. For example, the bunk bed I sleep on will rumble whenever I breathe to hard or shift. When I pick up on this movement my heart starts to race, my body shakes, and I can't breathe. I'm so convinced that there is someone hiding under my bed that I'm frozen with fear. I reassure myself that there isn't anyone there, but it does little to soothe my concerns. I run through all the scenarios that could happen if an intruder was under my bed, and ways I could fight them off. I also, own a pitbull who I know will protect me. But still... I can't get myself to calm down. The only way I'll be able to fall asleep is if I get up, run to the kitchen, grab a knife, and check to see if there really is anyone under there. And of course... There never is. It's terrifying to think that my body reacts this way to something so harmless, and even scarier that getting myself to calm down is incredibly difficult. It doesn't matter whose home, but being alone only makes my fears worse. These feelings happen almost ever night and force me to stay awake.
YOU ARE READING
Thoughts of a paranoid girl
Poetryinside the mind of someone who gets paranoid easily. I hope that if someone who gets worked up like I do to know that you aren't alone.
