TWDG//

FIFTEEN

"It's only the second day, AJ." Javi said.
We were in a seperate room, away from everyone else, with Gavin in the room.
"I know. And I'm sorry." I said. "I always mess up."
"I doubt that's true, AJ." Javi sighed. "AJ, I'm not mad. Self defence is okay, I guess, but where you positioned Gunner? It wasn't acceptable."
"What about his past, huh?" Gavin says from where he's sitting. "You don't know this about Gunner, but I do. He likes to--"
Gunner looks at me, before whispering a word, and continuing. "--children. It's wrong. I know what would've happened if AJ hadn't of punched him. And I know what would've happened if Clementine had gone to see him."
Javi sits there thoughtfully. "You're right. Sorry. Just..." Javi shudders. "That's sick."
"So you're not mad?" I ask.
"No. I never was." Javi smiled. "We need to talk to Gunner about this."
I stand up, and Gavin leads me out of the room. I see Gunner, who's jaw has swollen up. Lawson is behind him, holding him back. Gunner lurches forward. Gavin forces him back.
"Fuck off, Gunner" Gavin sneers. He guides me out of the way.
"--That limp faggot! I'll fuckin' kill him! I'll kill him!" Gunner yells. I wince at the volume, and move my pace up to get away.
"AJ, don't worry." Gavin says as we walk away. "He won't do anything."
"Not to Clementine?" I ask.
"No. Not to anyone." Gavin says as we walk upstairs. "He deserves what's coming to him."
I rub my sore cheek. It feels like little pins are pinching my cheek from the inside.
"Either way, you should talk to Clem." Gavin says. "She's distraught."
I sigh. "Yeah. She's probably mad at me."
"She can never be too mad at you, you know? She's your Mum." Gavin says.
"Not my real Mum." I said. "More like a sister. She raised me since I was born."
"Oh. I thought she was too young." Gavin laughs. "How old is Clementine?"
"Seventeen." I answer.
"There. She would've had to give birth to you when she was eleven." Gavin opens Clem's door. "Good luck."
I nod, and walk inside. Straight away, Clementine brings me into a hug.
"AJ, are you okay?" Clem cries into my shoulder.
"I'm fine." I said, hugging Clementine back.
"My god" Clem says, pulling back. Tears are rolling down her cheeks. She wipes them feebly.
"I'm fine." I repeat. "Are you okay?"
"Just...' Clem takes a deep breath. "What would've happened if you hadn't fought back..." Clementine shakes her head.
"What would've happened?" I asked.
Clem sighs, and pats the bed. "I've been putting it off for too long. Sit here."
...
I stare at my bedroom door angrily.
Now knowing what Gunner has done, it's makes me mad that all I did was just hit him.
And all those times he spoke about Clem?
I grunt, and start carving my knife into the wooden dresser. I need to breathe, like Clementine said. I take a few deep breaths, and start carving my initials into the the surface.
I hear a knock at the door. I out the knife away. "Come in!"
Gabe opened the door.
"Oh, hey." I said, staring glumly at the floor. Gabe sits down next to me.
"Clementine just said she...explained?" He asks.
"Yeah." I said. "It makes me...mad."
Gabe nods. "It sucks."
"Yeah."
"How about a game of euchre?" Gabe pulls a pile of tattered cards, the same ones Louis has, that is bound together with a rubber band.
"Euchre?" I ask.
"It's a card game. It's fun. I'll teach you." Gabe smiles, and takes the rubber band off. "You'll like it."
"Whatever it is, I'll win" I said confidently.
"We'll see about that." Gabe says with a mischevious smile. I laugh.
...
"See, I'm winning" Gabe says, putting his card down on top of mine.
"Not fair." I laugh, and put my card on his.
It was our fifth game, and it was all pretty even.
"This is the tie-breaker" Gabe laughs, and places down the card with a higher number.
"No.." I groan. Gabe laughs.
"Beat you." He chuckles.
Gabe shuffles his card into a pile, and ties them back up. "We can play this tomorow."
I nod, as Gabe leaves the room. I sigh,
The night has just settled. I decide to head downstairs with everyone else. Dinner must be ready soon.
As I walk downstairs, I realise that only Javi, Lawson, Gabe and Gunner are there. As soon as Gunner turns around and sees me, he frowns.
"Fuck off, kid." He snaps angrily. I just stand there. "Fucking move!"
"No." I said, crossing my arms. "Rapist."
Gunner stands up, and comes toward me. I'm so angry, I don't have time to be scared. Lawson kicks him from behind the knees, and Gunner falls down. "Fuck! Let me at him!" 
A weird sadistic feeling takes over me. I start to laugh. Javi frowns at me. I cover my mouth to stifle my laugh, but I can't help it. It's just so funny, to see someone as cruel and as angry as Gunner to be dragged away by Gavin and Lawson, thrashing and yelling. Willy walks down behind me.
"What the fuck!" He says. "What an idiot."
I compose myself and stop laughing. "Oh my god." I frown. "That's...."
"AJ?" Javi asks. "Are...are you okay."
I shake my head. Without thinking, I blurt "I'm a physcho."
"That's not true, AJ." Gabe said. "Just because you laugh at an asshole doesn't make you psychotic."
"Yes it does" I said. "I'm a murderer."
"...You saved Violet." Javi said, talking about Tenn. "You saved your friends."
I cross my arms. "I'm still a psycho. No matter what anyone says." I turn around and walk up the stairs. I open the door to the room, and slam it.
I flop onto the bed, and took off my shoes and socks, and went under the covers. I held myself int he dark, and began to cry.
What have I turned into?
I kill people, depict pain, and I like it.
I'm a walker.
Walkers do those things.
I begin to have a headache from crying, and I think about Tennessee.
Tenn.
James.
I did that. All of it.