White Daisies

Chapter 12

"Who did?"

My head hangs in defeat. "The Gestapo did."

He turns my face back to his and places a kiss on my ear. Still close to my ear, he whispers, "Darling, there is nothing more you could have done. They would have hurt you too, and the thought of that is enough to make my stomach sick. What they did was not your fault; this is on them."

I push my face into the crook of his neck. His arms wrap tight around me as if he's trying to shield me from the rest of the world. I close my eyes and revel in the warmth of his body heat. The fresh and familiar scent of his clothes calms me down, making me feel safer than anything in the past three days. I clench at the back of his shirt and ball the material in my hands. His fingers comb through my hair.

"I keep seeing you," I murmur into his throat. I know he doesn't understand what I say because the noise comes out muttered.

He hasn't shaved for the past few days, so his stubble tickles my cheek. I feel the vibrations of his voice. "What did you say?"

Pulling away, I use my hand to wipe the tears away from my face. "I keep seeing you."

"What do you mean?" He scours my face for meaning. His lips are set in a deep frown. 

"It's you in my dreams. Not Rabbi Beck. I keep seeing the Gestapo kill you." My fingers instinctively come up to play with the pendant that hangs from my neck. I feel my mind drift to the nightmares that I've had every time I've slept in the past couple of days. In my dreams, it would be Jacob being beaten on the ground instead of the rabbi. I would be powerless to stop the Gestapo officer from drawing his gun and firing at him. The sound of the ambulances would drown out my cries, and I would feel helpless and panicked every time I woke up. 

Understanding instantly fills his expression. "Oh, my sweet girl, what did I do to deserve you?"

I sniffle to keep the snot from running down my face. I'm taken back by the tenderness in his look.

He tucks my head underneath his and rests his chin on it. He resumes combing his fingers through my hair. "I'm going to be okay. You're going to be okay. We're both going to make it out of this war okay. But we need to stay low; we need to comply. Right now the Nazis aren't doing much here. As long as they aren't, we mustn't draw attention to ourselves."

"They shouldn't be here," I protest.

"No, they shouldn't be," he agrees. "But they are. And there's not much either of us can do about that. All we can do is try to make sure that we both come out of this alive."

He tilts my head up so he can look me in the eyes again. "To make sure that both of us come out alive," he taps my nose before continuing, "you need to eat. Your mother said that you've barely eaten anything in the past three days."

"I'm not hungry," I grumble.

"Did I ask if you were hungry? No."

He pushes me off of his lap and grabs the full plate of food sitting on my nightstand. He goes downstairs for a few minutes before he comes back up with a new plate of warm Frikadeller and seasoned potatoes. He places a glass of milk on my nightstand before sitting down beside me on the bed again.

He holds out the plate of food for me. "Eat up."

My stomach rolls at the smell of it. Food is the last thing that I want right now. I try to push it away from me. "I don't want to eat."

Jacob's face hardens. A little bit of his anger seeps into his voice, and he snaps, "Ana, don't fight me on this. You're going to eat, do you understand me?"

I recoil in shock. I've seen him yell at his brother before, but it's the first time he's ever raised his voice at me. Jacob must realize how harsh he sounded because his expression softens. He pulls me closer and sets the food in my lap. He pulls my hand towards his mouth to place a kiss on it.

"I'm sorry, Ana. I didn't mean to snap. I'm just worried about you," he apologizes.

I look down at my lap, trying to hide the wetness of my eyes. "It's okay."

"No, it's not. I'm sorry. Just please, try to eat? For me?" he pleads.

I stare at him for a minute before sighing. I pick up the fork that's on the plate and shove a piece of potato in my mouth.

 Satisfied, he smiles at me. "I love you."

I force myself to swallow the potato. I fight the urge to gag, and the corners of my lips quirk up to return his smile. "I love you too."

I'll do it for him. 

A/N: I apologize for this, but the updates will be a little slow for the next couple of weeks. It's the end of the semester, and I have several papers due. I will also be using this time to get the timeline and my primary sources in order for this story.