Your Remnants and Remorse

I can never hit you with a stone

at times I want to pick up a stone and throw it at you. But eventually I would be picking up flowers and throwing it over you. The stone never make it in front of you when I mean to throw it at you.

You make it too impossible for things to happen and it gets too complicated to withdraw too.

However things just goes by, over and over, again and again.

Now I am on another level of complexity.
Where you give me that mirage of happiness and like always it turns into a reflection of nothingness.

You give me nothing to love as such.

I am not an enigma. You make me one.
That often I find so hard to understand myself. Like for a moment I would be "that" and suddenly I would turn into "this".

How do you change me over a second? More of why do you even do that?

It is not really my fault. And neither I can put up the blame on you. But knowingly or unknowningly you cause it and you will cost it too. But how contradictingly it costs me more than it should cost you; even if it was never really my fault. Well maybe it's just my notion or maybe really not.

So really, at times I want to pick up a stone and throw it at you. But eventually I would end up plucking grasses off the meadow i lay on.

The stone just seemingly slip from my hand and gets replaced with your palms.

why. because I love you enough to hate you.