Outrageous (Vkook/Taekook)

Eleven. Luminous

Hiyaaaaaaaa guys. I'm not okay after the comeback of persona bishhhh. Just-just leave me alone to ball in the corner. Life is unfair. The album was lit. Okay. That's enough Momo. You need to write. Anyhow, this is a one way conversation. Enjoy whatever it is I'm going to feed you.
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Taehyung's POV.
I made a commitment. I...Kim Taehyung, made a freaking agreement to meet that piece of crap in the evening. Where? Han f**king river. I slam the paper files on my desk and take of my glasses to go and pack. I have been contemplating life in this lifeless and grey walled room. Feels like I'm in a prison cell. Even though I've been working here since forever. Plus I'm just...not into editing anymore. You cannot expect someone to be passionate about something from the moment of their birth to death. People change.
I look at my wrist watch and it's already four-thirty PM. I should probably stop degrading myself and get home to get ready for my meeting with the boy I like and hate to death simultaneously.
I hate that I like him. Since I came from a mother who was a vital member of the church, I should be doing the opposite instead of pining over a boy who is most likely not interested in me and is homophobic.
I should hate it, but now I can see the reality through my own eyes; I've become a little wiser from yesterday's daylight and faced the possibilities, it all points to one thing, that there is logically no reason to frown upon people who want to love regardless the gender.
Suddenly I get a text message from my roommate to whom I tell everything since he's the only older figure I have in my life-well Jung Hoseok too...I mean I think he's not so bad after all. We actually had been hanging out together a lot since Namjoon has to ask certain 'advice' from him everyday so he calls him over after university. I wonder what Namjoon has to talk about with him in particular, nevertheless I'll respect the privacy of my roommate.
As I was saying, Hoseok's  exterior is just for mere safety; he masks insecurity within himself which at times becomes very unhealthy. I look forward to seeing him open to me more.
I sigh as I conclude my thoughts and go lock my office. People think that I may be so rich, but to be honest Min Yoongi is the real trainer here; he bought this uniform for us to wear daily at the office. For 'privileged' reasons. I look down at my wrinkled Louis Voutton flannel as I walk out 'The Min Industry' door nonchalantly.
I sit in my car, thinking if I should go home or straight to Jungkook. I look at my time and already it's five o'clock, the time I allocated to him was five-thirty PM. Going home would take way longer and besides, I should show him the real me if I want him to accept me for me. That means I have to go in these crappy clothes. It's not that I don't like designer brands...it's that I much prefer Gucci.
*half an hour later*
Where is he? I look around in the nest of loud people. I finally free myself from the suffocating crowd and stumble near the river. I guess he got weirded out or maybe didn't want to come. How stupid am I? I dejectedly turn around to return but was met by a beautiful sound ringing my ears.
"You are the sunlight that rose again in my life, a reincarnation of my childhood dreams. I don't know what this emotion is or if this place is also inside a dream" the coconut headed boy was sitting on the yellow sand with closed eyes, singing something that would sound sentimental by its lyrics. His lips quiver uncontrollably and the usual luminous glow of his skin appears to be gone.
I decide to stand back and listen further. There is a pause, an uncomfortable pause which seems to have a subtext behind it. He takes a deep breath and continues on to sing with his angelic voice.
"I hear the far-away ocean, across the dream, over the horizon I'm going to the place that's getting clearer" his voice seems to get more unstable by the minute. I worry something may have triggered this behaviour. I'd never seen his other sides. Yeah he's a total daddy-um hot dude, but I want him to know that he can be vulnerable, emotionally unstable or even physically unwell.
I decide to intervene as he gets up and tries to push past without looking at my face.
"Woah there Jungkookie, calm down. It's Taehyung" I grab his arm softly to which he firmly grabs my shoulder and smiles at me. Damn even his grip is firm. Okay that's enough dirty thinking for the day. I seriously need to stop. Normally I would push someone away or yell incoherent slurs at them if they are this close, but I feel alive, now I know why this came into being; sometimes you cannot help but think that 'Man! my gender can be attractive at times too'. Jungkook wipes his snot with the sleeve of his jacket and I pull him down to sit next to me on the sandy white beach.
I've noticed that we share many indescribable silences between us. It often feels like it's our thing; whenever we're next to each other there are no words to be spoken. But the emptiness was getting prolonged and I had to initiate something. "I want to get to know you"
"How?"
He says coldly. I ponder for a moment. My eyes cannot dare to look at his sparkling brown orbs, so I just pretend to take in and observe the nature around me as the sunset illuminates the deep blue sea.
"We can start over" I say not knowing how nonchalant it sounded from his perspective.
He scoffs at the sheer irony. "Do you think that it's going to make it better? That I will convert from being a sh*thead  that easily? Why aren't you mad at me? I have done so much wrong, I've been heartless only because of my past. To be honest I brought that upon myself too; my father would never had done such a thing to me if I had listened to him! I am pathetic Taehyung. You don't deserve me-"
"And I'm f**ked up too Jeongguk. I humiliated those who just wanted to be loved! I called them outrageous but in reality, they were just beautiful humans; maybe some were more damaged than others-but that's the point. Humans are not perfect. Yeah maybe some are smarter than others but they still make mistakes in their lives to reach up to that point. Jungkook I can say from experience that you are certainly not worse than me. So be yourself; do whatever the stupid crap you want to do. I would never mind" I look away to expect a sudden outburst, but it never came. I turn around to see the boy smirking benevolently.
"You look nice when you get all professional" He then laughs nervously in an attempt to mask the embarrassment. I shake my head at the mess that was in front of me and pat his back. I don't understand this boy; one second he's all animated and the other second he just transforms into a strict yet hot beast.
I don't understand life to be honest. Never meant to have a thing for men, let alone my homophobic buddy. Once again there is that familiar silence of existentialism hovering between us. I cough to make a sound since it gets really awkward staying silent with someone after more than five minutes.
I don't know why Jungkook never seems to notice it though, he seems too caught up in his mind that it feels like he's forgotten where he is. "Jungkook. What do you think about?" I ask him out of the blue. Being surprised by my sudden interrogation, he clears his throat and opens his mouth to speak.
"When?" He asks as if it were the weirdest question ever. I laugh at his scrunched up yet somehow serious facial expression and continue to explain it to him.
"Whenever we are together, I mean I don't know if you do it with anyone else but...you always go into your mind space. There's an awkward silence over us and we both drift into our own worlds. Why can't you talk to me? Am I that rigid? I'm sorry-" He puts his slender finger above my lips and my body shakes from the soft touch.
"No it's not you. Um-my brother likes your...roommate? Is his name Namjoon?" He looks at me with a bewildered and scared expression before shutting up and attempting to escape the airy situation.
I remain silent for a while.
"Both of them have been meeting up behind our backs and been exchanging text messages really often. I caught Jin talking to him on the phone. All I could hear was something about him being scared that we both will find out. Especially since our past was quiet unnerving in regards to homosexuality" He speaks confidently this time around.
"Ahh..." I trail off.
So that's why Namjoon was talking to Hoseok privately. Its cause he's never dated and he wanted advice from the player himself, Jung Hoseok-well he used to be like that. Now he is in a committed relationship with some girl called 'Sunmi'? If that's even how you pronounce it.
"Well your brother is allowed to date my roommate, after all...he need a human interaction besides me" I chuckle in response to make him feel less pressured. Namjoon can do whatever he wants; he's an adult. Plus, I always wanted him to have a life of his own. Now I get why he had those 'Most Handsome Men Of 2018' magazines in his left drawer. I physically flush at the memory.
"Should we tell them and give them a surprise?" He looks at me as he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. I snort at his adorableness but then I remind myself that he's an actual beast from the inside so I shouldn't take my chances.
I nod in approval. "Yeah we could do something" He unintentionally puts his hand above mine, and I don't make an effort to tell him. This feels fine by me in my opinion-okay well more than fine.
It would be good to tell them that we both  are there with them. You may be thinking to yourself; how would we do that?
Well I have the perfect idea.
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Bangtan with the comeback had me likeeeeeeee......AH.
Oki I'll stop now.
Bye bit-I mean readers!