insecurities...

[4] a few heavenly minutes...

It was the most awkward drunken kiss in the history of awkward drunken kisses, and that's not even the worst part, the worst part is he never kissed me back. I know it was a spur of the moment thing, but still. It took me a few seconds to realize this, and I pulled away immediately, and ran for the door.

Yeah running, it's kinda my thing, I should actually be an athlete, the next Bolt, ha ha ha. I get overly sarcastic when am nervous, anxious and sometimes even embarrassed. I can't believe I did that, and why is this house so fucking big. After a few wrong turns, yeah probably to him, that kiss felt like watching wrong turn. I can't even imagine how repulsed he is of me, okay thank God, I found the front door.

My car is just on the corner, am still running, even thou I know his not coming after me, if he is it would probably be to kick my ass. If that's the case he would be surprised to know that I can hold my own, I was sort of, fuck I was a troubled kid growing up. Always in fights at school, not my fault I was short tempered or that I always won. Finally my car, as I reach the handle I let out a breath I didn't know I was even holding. I unlock my door and get in, what I didn't hear or notice since I was so preoccupied with...

The passenger door on the side of me just opened and closed too, and it's him, sitting a mere inches away from, my body is already a live wire and he wasn't even touched or talked to me. He looks so scenic, those long curly locks that blue denim jacket, those faded blue jeans, he looks like he just jumped out of of a fucking Taylor Swift music video. I actually didn't notice I was staring at him, and he was staring back at me, his eyes, I never noticed how blue they were before, there almost the same shade of blue as an ocean reef or lagoon but ten times better.

He learns in oh so slow towards me, and lays his hand on my cheek, my heart already feels as if it can burst the way it's beating so fast. He placing his lips on mine oh so gently as if he's afraid to break me, what the fuck I should probably be scared I would break him. He's so warm, and he's definitely doing this on purpose taking things so slow, it's killing me, but I'd rather have him take it slow then not at all. Somewhere between this kiss, my hands find them selves in his hair, rubbing slow circular motions in them, he tastes so good, way better then how I imagined him. His hands are still on his side, I want him to touch me, but he seems content with just this.

After a few minutes, yeah a few heavenly minutes, he pulls away. I can feel his breath of my neck as he smiles, "my names Lex by the way" he says in such a deep sexy ass tone that I almost want to kiss him again, but I have to take this slow for the both of us. " I know" I reply.

He quizzically looks at me, as if waiting for me to explain why I know him, I almost want to laugh because everyone knows Memphis's Golden boy, but instead I say, "I've heard a few things here and there" with my slightly seductive grin. "I hope all good things at that" he laughed it off. I join him and now we both laughing, it's been a while since I had a good laugh. "I'm Carter" I tease while fist bumping his shoulder, he returns it thou, much more gentle.

I like the way I am around him, it's as if his carefree and relaxed attitude is rubbing off on me. Then I realize we're still in my car outside the frat house, it almost felt as if time stood still for us, he seems so uncomfortable, unsure of him self. I want to tell him that I understand what his going through but I know it will do nothing. Just as am about to speak, he jumps out of the car and walks back to the frat house, he doesn't even look back at me, as if the kiss was an experiment to see which way he bends, he couldn't give shit about my feelings, but then again, I did the same thing at the frat house.