Caps lock is intentional. Because you don't see them very often.
.........................
ONCE
THERE WAS A VENDING MACHINE
OF DEATH.
A LOT OF PEOPLE
WOULD BUY THINGS
FROM THE VENDING MACHINE
OF DEATH.
ONE DAY
A MAN NAMED FLYNN
CAME UP TO THE VENDING MACHINE
OF DEATH
AND HE ORDERED A POPSICLE
AND WALKED AWAY WITH IT
THE POPSICLE
OF DEATH.
IT TASTED LIKE STRAWBERRIES
STRAWBERRIES OF DEATH.
AND ONCE FLYNN ATE THE WHOLE THING
HE WAS HIT BY A FLYING DONUT
OF DEATH
AND THEN HE FELL INTO THE STREET
AND HE DIED.
THE NEXT MAN
HIS NAME WAS ORANGE JUICE
HE WALKED UP TO THE VENDING MACHINE
OF DEATH
AND HE ORDERED A SANDWICH
BECAUSE APPARENTLY
THE VENDING MACHINE
OF DEATH
HAD BOTH SANDWICHES AND POPSICLES
.....
OF DEATHH
AND IT HAD PEPPERONI ON IT
(THE SANDWICH DID)
((NOT THE POPSICLES))
AND THEN WHEN ORANGE JUICE WALKED AWAY
HE WAS ENCOUNTERED BY A WEIRD NORWEGIAN MAN
AND THE NORWEGIAN MAN SAID:
"WHY IS YOUR NAME ORANGE JUICE?!"
AND THEN ORANGE JUICE SAID:
"BECAUSE MY MOM LIKES ORANGES!! ALSO, I NEVER TOLD YOU MY NAME, SO HOW DO YOU KNOW?"
"BECAUSE I CAN READ MINDS," THE NORWEIGAN MAN SAID.
"I WASN'T THINKING ABOUT MY NAME THOUGH," ORANGE JUICE SAID.
"THAT. DOESN'T. MATTERRRRR!!!"
AND THEN THE NORWEIGAN MAN KICKED HIM IN THE FACE.
AND THEN ORANGE JUICE DIED.
THE THIRD MAN
HIS NAME WAS POIT
DON'T ASK
THAT WAS HIS NAME
HE WENT UP TO THE VENDING MACHINE
OF DEATHHH
AND HE ORDERED A COKE
WHICH WAS THE ONLY NORMAL THING
ANYONE WOULD ORDER FROM A VENDING MACHINE
....
(OF DEATH)
AND ONCE HE TURNED AROUND
THERE WAS A RANDOM AFRO MAN
AND HE SAID:
"LOOK AT ALL THE CHAIRS MR. WHITE!"
AND THEN POIT SAID:
"WHO'S MR. WHITE?"
AND THEN THE RANDOM AFRO MAN SAID:
"HEY, BUCKET."
TO WHICH POIT REPLIED:
"I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT."
AND THEN THIS NINJA CAME OUT
AND SAID:
"YOU HELP ME SHOVEL?"
"TOO SLICK FOR YOUUUUU!!"
(THAT WAS AFRO NINJA AGAIN)
"IS THERE A GANDALF LEFT NOW?"
(THAT WAS THE NINJA AGAIN)
AND POIT LOOKED AT THEM WEIRD
AND THEN HE GAVE BOTH OF THEM CHOCOLATE BARS
AND THEN BOTH THE AFRO MAN AND THE NINJA SAID:
"THANK YOU SIR. HAVE A NICE DAY."
AND POIT WAS THE ONLY PERSON
WHO ORDERED FROM THE VENDING MACHINE
OF DEATH
WHO DIDN'T DIE
.... OF DEATH.
MORAL OF THE STORY: GIVE RANDOM STRANGERS CHOCOLATE.
ČTEŠ
InkeQuizzles and Chocolate Cake
HumorWelcome to the strange nonsensical world full of the almighty Inkequizzles and evil Chocolate cake, extracted from the colorful universe of my very own brain. The chapters of this book don't follow any particular storyline altogether; they're mostly...
