Stay With Me (Shawn Mendes)

Eleven

I have been out of the hospital for less than 3 hours and I feel amazing already. Okay, so technically I have still been in the hospital for those 3 hours, but not as a patient. As soon as I was released I went to see Shawn.

"You're out?" Shawn asked as I walked into his room in normal clothes and not a hospital gown.

"I'm finally free," I said, dramatically throwing my arms in the air.

"Good. Are you going to be out for good?" Shawn questioned.

"Yes. I'm done with purging," I told him matter-of-factly. At the moment this was true. I didn't want to end up dead because I hated myself. There were better things to live, and die, for.

"Good," Shawn smiled and placed a kiss on my cheek.

"How are you?" I asked, taking the subject away from me.

He shrugged. "I have a lot of physical therapy still but I'm doing better."

"I don't know if I should take your word for that or if you're just lying," I said.

"When have I ever lied to you?" he asked in false hurt.

"Good question," I replied, glowering at him.

The door to his room opened and my mom walked in. She was wearing her nursing scrubs and her hair was pulled into a tight pony tail. "Ready Arden?"

"Yeah. I'll be out in just a second," I told her, telling her to leave the room without actually saying those exact words.

"I'll talk to you later," Shawn said when she was gone.

"Yeah. I'll try to come tomorrow after school, but I'll probably be busy with homework," I groaned. I had tried to do as much of my homework here at the hospital as I could but I knew I hadn't gotten some of it done.

"Do your homework first. It's more important," Shawn said and kissed me.

"Okay. I'll keep that in mind," I smiled. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight," he said before I walked out of his room.

I walked to where my mom was talking with one of her coworkers down the hall.

"Hi Arden," the familar woman who's name I couldn't make out.

"Hello," I said smiling.

"You look pretty," she said.

"Thank you." I wondered if she was just saying that because she knew I had been in the hospital for my self esteem issues or because she actually thought I looked pretty. I guess it didn't really matter, I still liked the compliment.

"We should get going. Arden still has homework to do," my mom said. "I'll talk to you tomorrow, Rachel."

I knew I knew her. Rachel used to play with me while she was supposed to be working when I was younger. My mom and I walked to the elevators and rode to the ground floor.

"How are you feeling today?" my mom asked as we started walking towards the car.

"I'm better than normal actually," I said surprised.

"That's good. Are you okay to go to school tomorrow or do you want to wait another day?"

"I think I'll be fine tomorrow. Other than I have so much to catch up on," I said, muttering the last part to myself.

"You can stay home and catch up on your homework tomorrow," she suggested. We got into the car and she started it.

"Are you really okay with that?" I questioned. I didn't think my mom would ever suggest something like that. She liked me to be at school as often as I could.

"As long as you actually get work done, or rest."

"Okay. I think I'll just stay home then."

It was silent until the curiosity was eating me alive and I had to know why she was going to allow for me to stay home.

"Why are you letting me do things you normally wouldn't let me do?" I asked.

"Just so you can catch up on school. Or be better rested. You need to do your best at school."

"Okay," I nodded. I didn't think that was the real reason but I didn't want to as her too many questions, in fear she might make me go to school tomorrow, so I let it go.

***

"Arden!" Elizabeth squealed as I walked in the door.

"Hey Elizabeth," I smiled, wrapping my arms around her.

"I heard about Shawn," she smiled.

"Is that the reason you're so happy?" I laughed. Of course it was, why else would she love me this much?

"No. I love you, too," she said, planting a slobbery kiss on my cheek.

I looked at the clock and saw it was only 7 p.m but I was so tired I was fighting to keep myself awake.

"I think I'm going to go to sleep. I'm exhausted," I told my parents at 8:30 after we ate.

"Okay, goodnight," my mom said, rubbing one of her hands up and down my back.

"Sweet dreams," my dad said and kissed me on the forehead.

I walked down to my room and changed from the clothes I had been wearing all day to a pair of basketball shorts and a tank top. It was still cold outside but in my room it was like a sauna. I laid down on my phone, mostly texting Shawn, for about an hour before I went to sleep for real. I laid my phone down on the floor beside my bed and let the exhaustion overcome my body.