They Say Time's A Healer

Heartbreak

"You wouldn't." Simon gasped. He wouldn't be able to keep this from the girls. And he didn't want to face it at all. But...looking his friends faces, he might as well just spill. "Raphael and I are through. He was cheating, I walked in on him and now we are over. No more, Simon and Rapha forever. Am I upset? Sure, but life goes on. I can't sit still and feel sorry for myself. It was j-just eight years. I'll be fine. In fact, I-I am f-fine." He cursed the stinging in his eyes. He hadn't allowed himself to dwell on the fact that his life with Raphael was over.

He had gone home that night with some guy, whose name he couldn't remember and he had spent every night since then with a different person. He told himself he was making up for lost time. He had been with Raphael since he was in high school. In retrospect , it was silly to think they'd end up together, but that was the love of his life and he was happy. Now, seeing the shocked looks on his friends' faces, he tried to back track. "Hey, it's cool. I'm a big boy. It's no big deal."

"Are you insane?" Magnus snapped. "Raphael did what?" Then he turned and walked back into the bedroom he shared with Alec.

"Why is he mad at me?" Simon asked, confused. "I said I was-"

"Rapahel, what the fuck?!"

"Oh." Simon turned and poured himself a cup of coffee and stared to put sugar in it. Alec made a a pained noise when he put the fourth spoon. "Really, Simon?"

"Hey, I am not like you." Simon smiled, his chest aching. "I like my coffee to have a bit of personality."

"But..." Alec shook his head. Simon heard Magnus coming back to the kitchen and he started to go back to his room. Alec held his elbow and shook his head.

"And I thought you were on my side." Simon said and sat down, resigned. He might as well just get it over with.

He had been friends with Magnus and Clary first. Magnus was the big brother he never had and Clary was his weird lesbian best friend who was like a sister. Not like he didn't love his sister Rebecca, but Clary got him a lot more than his family did. Then Magnus met Alec, and with Alec came Izzy and they were all just a group of friends who became family. Raphael was Magnus's friend who was a bit standoffish but Simon hadn't let that stop him. He had a bit of a crush on the guy, if he was being honest with himself. They had been uneasy friends until one night Raphael had kissed him and confessed to having feelings for him. That was his senior year in High school and they had been inseparable.

Until now.

"Do you want to talk to him?" Magnus said, holding the phone to him. Simon stared at the phone and then shook his head. He couldn't. He was barely holding it together as it is. Talking to Raphael now would not be pretty.

"No." He cleared his throat and took a sip of his too sweet coffee. Alec was right, he added too much sugar.

"Simon?" Magnus called him. He had hung up the phone. "Why didn't you say anything? I thought we were friends."

"I didn't want to bother you guys." Simon mumbled, giving up on his coffee. "I didn't want to do this. I don't want to do this. I don't want to deal with this. If I start to think about it, I'll lose it and I don't want to. I don't want to think about him. Or the last eight years. "

"You want to ignore it till it goes away?" Magnus sat next to him. "That doesn't work, you know that. Remember Camille?"

Simon laughed, although it sounded more like a hiccup. He was unraveling. Damn it. "Do I?"

"You were there for me." Magnus held his hand. "You were annoying, but you made sure I didn't spiral. If you hadn't dragged me out, I wouldn't have met Alexander and I wouldn't be this happy. Why won't you let us do that for you?"

Simon avoided his gaze, blinking away tears. "I-I...It was eight years. He was the love of my life. And now I can't think about him without wanting to break something. And I don't want to...Damn it!" He pressed his hands to his eyes and sucked in shuddering breaths.

"I'm calling Clary." Alec said.

"D-Don't." Simon said weakly. "You know how she gets."

"Hey..." Magnus said. "We are family. And we have to be there for each other. It's OK to be sad. If it makes you feel better I can let Clary beat him up for you."

Simon laughed, then sobbed. "She's tiny. He won't feel it. Have Alec do it. If you ask, I'm sure he would too."

"Have Alec do what?" Alec came back into the room.

"Kick Raphael's ass." Magnus said, rubbing Simon's back.

"Sure. Just say when."

Simon put his head on the counter and let the tears fall.

******

"You know, Simon, this is every straight guy's dream." Bat, Maia's boyfriend, said walking into his room and sitting at the foot of his bed. It was, late in the afternoon and Simon was being cuddled by Clary, Izzy and Maia on his bed.

Clary, bless her heart, had lost it when Magnus told her what happened. Simon had just stared, watching her rant. They had given up their traditional Saturday lunch outing for staying home with Simon. He felt guilty because he didn't want anybody to treat him any differently and Izzy had told him that they were family and family was there for one another.

"Eww." Izzy said, throwing a pillow at Bat.

"I apologize for my boyfriend." Maia said, rolling her eyes.

Simon sighed. He was grateful that his friends were around. He was planning to go to the gym and pound Raphael's hypothetical face to dust before he was "ambushed".

"I have to call my mom, and Becks." He murmured. "I can't make it to lunch tomorrow."

Clary kissed his cheek. "You can do that tomorrow. Just relax, what do you want to do tonight? And no, we aren't going out. Magnus said, you have become a bit of a horndog. I can't believe I didn't see that."

"I'll kill him." Maia hissed.

"So...like a different person every night? For three weeks?" Bat asked. "Dude!" The expression of awe on his face changed to one of faux disappointment. "Dude!"

Simon covered his face. "I can't believe it myself. I think some part of me just wanted to catch up on eight years of being a complete idiot. I mean, I even made out with Jordan."

Izzy gasped. Then a collective "Eww."

"Sorry Maia." Simon said, sinking lower into the bed. She laughed and kissed his head.

"It's OK."

"My poor sweet Simon." Clary cooed. "Being debauched by that...that Jordan!"

"Err, Clary," Simon started. "I was the one..."

"Shh, let her have this." Izzy said, kissing his temple.

"So, Star Wars or Lord of the Rings?" Bat asked.