Sean and Kaycee one shots

3. Am I beautiful yet

I started thinking back trying to think about the last time i saw her eat something. It was about a week ago we were having lunch with some friends since we were all in town for once. She got some pasta although she wound up only eating half of it. It was a large serving though, if she had some eating problem she wouldn't have eaten that much. Right? She did seem kinda uncomfortable while ordering and eating but she ate. We all went back to my house and started blasting music from the speakers. She still seemed a little uncomfortable but she seemed fine after going to the bathroom.

The bathroom.

Shit.

No it cant be she would never do that to herself. Shes beautiful in every single way and she knows that. Im sure shes just been working out more. I mean all the fans are asking her to drop her workout routine so maybe its just that.

Deep inside i knew, but I didn't want to believe it.

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Kaycee

It was way earlier than i would have liked but me, Sean,Tahani, and Bailey had already agreed to go to Janelle's class this morning. Im not feeling up to dance. I feel extremely cold and light headed but thats what i get for not eating. Its the price of being skinny.

Sean was picking me up for class and decided to head out early for some reason. He would be here soon so i had to hurry and get ready. My parents were in the kitchen so i grabbed an apple on the way out and put it in my bag to throw away later.

I get into Seans car and we start driving. We sit in silence but not an awkward silence. A comfortable silence. Speaking with our eyes rather than our mouths.

Eventually Sean pulls up to a small cafe. Shit. I dont want to go in because i dont want to eat to much. People tend to think that people with eating disorders hate food but its actually quite the opposite. I dont hate food i hate what food does to me.

We walk in and i see a million different treats. I wanted to eat them so badly and it didn't help that i hadn't eaten in the last 48 hours. How am i alive? I honestly have no idea. It kinda shocks me that i haven't been hospitalized or anything like that yet. I knew it was coming soon. I mean im a 5.2 16 year old who weighs 84 pounds and is still not content with her weight.

"What do you want" Sean asks me

I tell him I'm not hungry and already ate but he wouldn't listen so now in Sitting in front of a ton of food. Sean isn't letting me go easily so i finish all of it to show him that i can. We then actually head to the studio.

Once we get there Sean goes off to talk to Janelle and i slip off to a bathroom. We're still really early even with stopping for breakfast so i dont worry and no one was near the bathroom so i wasn't worried about anyone hearing or finding out.

I wash my hands before bringing my fingers to my mouth. I pushed my fingers down my thought until i could feel the vomit coming up. I emptied my stomach of its contents and shivered feeling extremely cold and light headed.

Once i was done i heard Tahanis voice "Kaycee are you ok it sounded like you were throwing up"

I told her that i was ok and wasn't sick but i could tell she wasn't fully believing it.

Once i came out we walked to class. I felt extremely light headed and knew that if i started dancing i would likely pass out but i decided to dance anyway because i didn't want to let anyone down.

I made it through the lesson an watched everyone else dance. Then out of no where Janelle calls me up. I start dancing and im sure everyone could tell that something was up. About halfway through the dance my legs gave out on me. As I feel my vision started to go black. The last thing i saw was Sean and Janelle running towards me.