I give him a month (Kellic) BoyxBoy

Everyday's a constant battle

I whiped some blood off my lip with my shirt sleeve, and took my Inhaler, laptop, and razors out. The only things that have been helping me out these past sad, endless days.

As I sat on my bed, I carefully opened the small wooden box that held all of my little friends. I got my favorite one, the sharpest, and insepected it carefully with wonder. It was brand new. I took it from a pencil sharpener that was in art class. Such a dull, and dead piece of metal that probably meant nothing to the world, meant the world to me. I needed it. I twirled it around with my fingers, lightly touching the cold, sharp edge.

My name is Kellin Quinn Bostwick, and I'm sixteen. I live in front of my school, which is pretty stupid if you ask me, considering i'm always bullied. I'm mute, and gay, and I never really had any real boyfriends, let alone ever felt love for that matter. Art and music are my life. I can't live without them, and I don't think I could even go a day without them either. I have depression...these voices in my head, these thoughts of suicide, and dreams of dying... all seem normal to me now.

I put down the razor and placed it carefully back in it's box. Not today.

Not now at least...

I remembered that I should be heading to school now. sadly. I glanced at the clock on my desk. 6:30.

Nobody ever understood why I was  mute. People just think that I'm stupid. Not going to lie, I was pretty smart, A nerd if you will. What do you expect? I live across the god damned place, and have tons of time to help my teachers after school and study.

Study. That's basically why i'm still  holding on. If I study, then maybe, just maybe, there might be a chance that I have a better life In the future.
That's what you think...

But lately, I couldn't help but feel like I've been holding onto false hope. What if I actually do get into a good school, and I actually do something good with my life. Will I actually, be happy? Might as well just kill me now, and put me out of my fucking misery. They can keep their own damned American dream. I took a deep, painful breathe from my inhaler and stood up.

I took a long shower, and got dressed. I settled for a black tanktop with a red flannel and some black skinny jeans with my black TOMS. I grabbed my phone, my bag, and my black hoodie.

With one last sad smile, I was out of the house before you knew it. The cold April breeze hit my face, making the fresh cut on my lip sting slightly. I didn't even bother to eat breakfast, I just wanted to get the hell out of there. I didn't each much anyway...I didn't deserve to.

I sighed deeply, and crossed the street, shoving my hands deeply into my hoodie's pockets. The giant build- board thing, at the front of the school, read 'Mission Bay High' in gold and silver letters. I walked into the courtyard, full of teenagers like in any stupid cliche movie, and went to sit under the big oak tree in the middle of the courtyard.

As soon as I sat down, I reached into my satchel, and tried to untangle my earphones as fast as possible. Id rather listen to punk rock, then their stupid conversations about Drake's new song, or Nicki Minaj's ass. Two snobby boys walked pass me. I think there names were Dan and Phil. Probably transfers from the poorer school the next town over, Clairemont High.

"Ugh, I don't want to sit next to the faggot!!" Phil screeched in disgust, his british accent making him sound ten times more infuriating. Dan laughed wickedly as they walked away.

"Why don't you just kill yourself, you fucking disgrace!" Dan yelled behind his back as they walked away. I heard their conversation die down until something struck my interest. Before Phil muttered something that could be my only chance.