Am I Happy ???

Chapter 3

Sun rays fell over my face as I woke up in the morning.
As I  opened my eyes I started recalling  what had happened the previous day still laying on bed. The more I started to think about it the more I began to hate myself. I gently shut my eyes again. I didn't feel like waking up. I was not in the mood to face the world,  the people, my fiancée and not even my best friend. I wanted to go somewhere far away.  I wanted to escape from my life.  But that's the funny thing about life, isn't it? You can never run away from it? Realizing that I opened my eyes.  I got up and went to take a bath. I literally took a two hour long shower cause I knew I didn't had to go anywhere but also  I really needed it. I have never taken such a long shower in my entire life.  Maybe this was the first time I was stressed to such an extent. I changed myself into a black T-shirt and white pajamas. I combed my hair into a messy bun.
I was about to go to the living room when I heard my phone beep. I checked my phone and gazed on the notification screen. My eyes were wide open with shock.  Fuck.  My mom was coming to my house in ten minutes. Ten fucking minutes. 

"Calm down Ash. Calm down"
That was all I could say to myself.  I quickly went to the living room and cleaned the entire mess.  Wrappers were scattered everywhere. Numerous tissues were lying on the floor.  I cleaned all the mess in the kitchen, living room and arranged all the cushions properly on the sofa.
After everything was done I heaved a sigh of relief. Did I just clean everything in ten minutes?? I didn't know whether to be happy or surprised. Before I could process what I just did the door bell rang.
As soon as I opened the door I could see my mom smiling at me. She was genuinely glowing with happiness. She then wrapped her hands around me.

"I am so happy for you honey" she said still hugging me.

"For what exactly" I said with a confused face. 

"My baby is getting married. Finally" She said while releasing me from her hug.

"How did you come to know about this? " I asked with a questioned face.

"You never tell me anything you know.  We should talk more often.  Anyways Andrew told me about it."

Great.  Just fucking great.

"When did he speak to you about this? "

"Yesterday."

"Oh"

"Do you know how happy he was? " She said smiling.

"He said that he's very lucky to have you. He loves you  so much Ash."

"Ya he does." I said. I managed to smile a little but inside I was really sad.

"He also said that you were sick. You don't seem sick though."

"Ya I was yesterday but now it's all good. I woke up late in the morning so anyways I could have not been able to make it  to work. "

"Okay great so now you guys can plan for your wedding right. "

"He spoke to you about that too. "
I said a little bit irritated.

"Ya. I mean he's family now so it's fine. "

I was really irritated. He told everything to my mom and didn't have the decency to even ask me. I understand that he wants to become a part of my family but this is too much. The worst part is I really don't want to marry him. My feelings for him are gone. They are faded. Every fucking person that i might have known in my life might  known about this now . You know how do I know that?  Because my mom knows about it and I am damn sure she must have told it to everyone.

" So um are you staying here? " I said.

"Well you sound like you don't want me to stay. "

"No no that's not what I meant.  I was just asking. "

" It's fine.  I get it. I mean now you and Andrew are getting married and you are so in love right now  so obviously you will need privacy to you know have 'ice cream. "

"What? "

"You know what I mean. "

"Oh gosh mom  for the last time you can say the word SEX. It's okay. It's not that big a deal and please I really don't want to talk about this with you. "

"Okay fine and listen if you don't want kids right now it's okay. Just don't forget to use protection. "

"Mom this is not the first we have had sex.  We are not having this conversation again " I said in an embarrassed tone.

"Okay fine. "

The door bell rang again.  Who is it now? I opened the door. Amelia was standing on the doorstep.

"Hey. Listen I know you had a rough day yesterday but I want you to enjoy today.  So I have decided to spend this whole day with you and I have also brought...... drumroll Your favorite Choco chips. Then we will watch a  movie on Netflix and I am giving you full freedom to decide this time. No crying, no tension,  just you and me chilling together." she said while pulling out the packet from her bag.

"Well actually there's someone else here. "

"Who?  Did you get a new boyfriend? "

"What? No it's my...

" Who's is it at the door Ash?" said my mom interrupting me.

"Your mom is here. " Amelia whispers.

"Yup" I replied.

My mom comes towards the door.

"Oh Amelia it's you. Hi sweety. " my mom said with a smile.

"Hi. "

"Come in. Don't stand outside. "

Amelia comes inside.

"That's why your house is so clean. " she whispers to me and I smile. She just knows how to lighten my mood. I know I didn't wish anyone to come here,  not even my best friend but the fact that she doesn't want me to go through this alone reminds me how much she loves me. I love her too and I genuinely don't know if I could ever reciprocate her love for me.

"Oh wow you bought ice cream. " my mom said.

"Ya." Amelia says.

"Let me get that. I'll put it in the fridge   " my mom said while taking the ice cream from Amelia's hand. She then headed towards the kitchen.

" Dude my mom knows about my engagement. " I whisper.

"What? How? " she said shockingly.

"Andrew talked to her about it. "

"Oh god this is really bad. "

"I know right. I don't know what to do now. Help me. "

"You need to talk to Andrew about this. That's the only solution to this problem. "

"I.. Ok fine I guess I have to do this. You know what I will call him right now. " I said confidently.

"Your kitchen is so clean. You have really become very responsible now. " my mom says arriving from the kitchen.

If cleaning the entire house in 10 minutes immediately after getting the news of my mother's arrival sounds responsible then I guess I am responsible.

"Thanks mom. So.. um.. I just want to go to my room to check on some files. I will be back okay.  Just wait here. " I said.

I quickly climbed up the stairs and headed towards my room.

"Okay Ash you can do this. " I told myself.

I took a deep breath and dialed Andrew's number.