band smut & imagines [requests closed]

Christmas Miracle (Gerard Way - smut)

for killjoybadass

"Gee watch out!!!" He swerves the car desperately trying to avoid a crash.  Fear and adrenaline course through my veins as the headlights of the oncoming truck get closer and closer. The industrial vehicle bashes into the side of our car. I hear screams of agony. Then silence. My world spins. The goes black.

I open my eyes and scan the stark- white room. Beeps can be heard from all directions. I can't tell if I'm hearing things or not. I muster enough strength in my left arm to move it and feel a slight tug at my arm which I'm assuming are tubes. Yep, hospital. I roll my eyes around, taking in all my surroundings. Nothing but blinding white walls, even whiter furniture, and someone draped in white. A nurse? A nurse. Nurse! Help! I need help!

"Help... Me..."

The person cloaked in white rushes over to my side. Welp, that worked.

"You're awake," she beams, flashing her pearly white teeth.

I look around one last time searching for any sign of Gerard. Chair. Curtain. Nurse. Monitor. Window. Chair. Curtain.. Curtain. He's gotta be on the other side. I attemp to raise my arm again but ultimately fail and just end up pointing slightly to my left with my index finger.

"G..Gee." The nurse looks at me with furrowed brown; utterly confused. "Gerard." Her mood changes to that of sympathy, but I don't understand why at first.

"Ma'am, can you understand me?" I blink twice for yes and hope she understands me. She continues, "Your husband, Gerard, passed away. He suffered from fluid on the brain. The impact of the collision caused fluids in his frontal lobe to leak, flooding the necessary free space between brain and skull.  He's no longer with us. I'm sorry." She reaches down to comfort me by holding my hand. The last thing I want to do is hold her hand -  She just told me he's dead - but I dont have enough strength to pull away.

Gee's gone.

•••

It's been a year since he left me. They say it eventually gets easier, but it hasn't. At least not for me. He's still the first thing I think of when I wake up and the last thing to cross my mind before I fall asleep. I replay our greatest memories for dreams. The movie of our lives vividly embedded in my brain; replaying every time I close my eyes. Our first date. Our wedding. Our honeymoon. When we bought our first house. Everything about him. I just can't forget. I don't known if I want to. I'd feel guilty for moving on so easily. I could never be with anyone else. Live anywhere else. Sleep in another bed. I can't restart. I just can't. Not yet.

•••

Two p.m. Christmas afternoin. Every holiday's so dreadful without Gee around. The one who used to fill me with such joy and happiness just gone in the blink of an eye.

A measly tree sits slouching in the corner by the recliner. It's still up from last Christmas. After the accident I didn't want to take it down. Gee put it up. The decorations - whats left of them at least - are falling off. The tree skirt is askew, showing all of the metal work holding the tree upright.

I'm going to try to be happy this year. I wipe my nose that I hadn't noticed running and head over to the tree. Fixing the tree skirt and replacing the fallen ornaments, the tree starts to come together. A picture of me and Gerard lays on the ground at the very back of the tree. I pick it up and prop it up against the star at the very top. I wipe a few escaped tears from my ruby cheeks and walk to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee as I await the annual phone call from my mother in Bora Bora; telling me how great it is and how glad she is it's not snowing down there.