Tied to You

Isolated

I woke up in the middle of night to found myself in an unknown dark room. Where am I? This room, it feels quite distant, yet so familiar. I think I know this place. I take a look around, and then, the realization hit me. I couldn't ever fail to recognize this place; it's where I've spent the dark days of my life - my childhood.
What am I doing in this house? Why I am here? How get here? I had so many questions popping in my head. I made a run outside the room to come across the place, that has been haunting me for years. The balcony. The same place where everything ended.
Heedlessly, I moved forward. Taking a closer look I realised there was a woman standing out there, just like my mother used to, when she was upset.
"Ma!" I shouted, gaining her attention. She turned around; and to my astonishment, she wasn't my mother. It's Khushi! She looked straight at me, piercing her accusing glares through my soul. A continuous stream of tears rolling from her grievous eyes. I took a step in her direction but she takes one back, and before I could do more she fell off the edge.
"Khushiiii....."
I jolted out of my bed, shouting Khushi's name. Like a maniac, I scanned the surroundings, and to my relief I was still in my room of my house in Dubai. Heaving a sigh I leaned on the headboard, wiping the sweat beads off my face. Even in this air conditioned room, I am fully drenching in sweat. I get off the bed and carried my limping body to the mini bar in my room, made myself a drink, and finished it in one single shot.
These horrifying nightmares! They have became a part of my life over the past eighteen months.
Yeah! It has been eighteen months of that fateful day; eighteen months since I left India.
After all I did, back in Delhi, I couldn't stay there; I couldn't face her anymore. I know what I did to her was wrong, utterly wrong. With in my heart, I knew it all along, I knew it when I hurled all those accusations on her, I knew it when I indict her for stealing. But still I  carried all those hideous acts, because I I felt cheated; I felt betrayed, betrayed by my own people. I was so much swallowed by the hatred and rage that I lost all the senses of just and unjust. At that time all I wanted was to prove myself right, show nani that how she has mistaken again in trusting someone. And, I did everything I could at that time to achieve my aim, used every opportunity, every mean to degrade her. But, couldn't mortify her, and it's because.....she was innocent; and somewhere, I already knew it.
I knew it all along.

Heaving a sign of frustration I grabbed the scotch bottle and made another peg, then another and another; and kept on drinking till the whole bottle got emptied, till my senses got numbed, till I forget my crimes. But, it's not possible to obliviate the sin I've committed. It's going to haunt me for the rest of my life.

*****************

I woke up with a throbbing head as if someone hammered it; clutching it in my hands I walked till bathroom with heavy steps and splashed some cold water to ease off the pain. This has been a routine for last several months. I wakes up in the middle of night and drink till wee hours of morning.
Yeah! Pretty messed up, I know.

After a quick shower I changed into my Tom Ford and heads for AR's Dubai office, in my newly purchased Bentley Continental GT. For the last few years AR has handled several famous and mega construction projects in Dubai, and for the reason is considered as one of the best developer, not only here and in India, but all over the world.
When we got a new hotel project one and half year ago, I wasn't intending to personally handel it; but after what happened back in India I found this project a best excuse to escape all the mess - mess my life had became. I know people might judge me as a coward, who ran away from his problems. But, it was my guilt that forced me into this isolation. Yes, I have been living in isolation, far from my family. I rarely have a conversation with them. It's always di who calls to inquire about my well being; or sometimes Akash, but his purpose is purely professional. Oh, and talking about Akash! He is a father now. A father of a healthy six month boy. He was so proud when he shared the news with me, fifteen months back. A hint of a smile reaches my lips as I think of his son. Would I and Khushi have a baby too? Only if things were different; only if I hadn't behaved like an asshole; only if I have heart to release the ghost of my troubled past.
We too could have a family, a small, happy family. But, I destroyed the chance....with my own hands.

A sudden loud honk brought out of the vague memories. I look behind; a row of cars, honking, drivers asking me to move on. I realized the signal has turned green and I am still halting, blocking everyone's way. As I pushed hard the accelerator, the car zoomed with the speed of a tornado; and in about twenty minutes of drive I reached my destination.
"Good Morning Sir!"
I received several greetings from my staff as I walked the distance from the main door till my cabin; and I, with a firm expression, just kept on nodding as a reply.
"May I come in Sir?" came in Lisa, my P.A.
"Yes, come in." I permitted.
"What's my schedule for today?" the first thing I inquired about was the work I have to do. I need to immerse myself into lot of works, because this is the only thing keeping me sane; this is the only escape route.
The morning time is almost free, at 1p.m. you and Christine ma'am have a lunch meeting with Mr. Zahid Sheik, he wants to discuss about his hotel's interior, and then at 3p.m. a meeting with the team of architects." she narrated, looking at her ipad.
"That's all?" I asked, not liking the idea of spending half of my day, doing nothing.
"Yes sir."
"Any files I need to go through?"
"No sir, not yet."
"Okey, you can go now." I dismissed her after that.
Damn it! Now what am I suppose to do?
I opened the laptop to read some news when my phone started ringing. It's an unknown number; and it's Indian. Who it could be? I've all of my family members' mobile number saved. May be someone got a new one. I recieved the call without much delay.
"Hello!" I said but there was no reply from the other end. I could clearly hear someone's breathing sound; so I tried again "Hello, who is it?" still no reply. Being annoyed I was about to drop the call when I heard a very much low sound, almost a whisper, trying to say something.
"Whoever you are, would you speak up or not?" I lashed out at her. Untill now I've realised that the voice belongs to a woman.
"Hello." said she, in a voice louder than before.
And, my heart skipped a beat; breathing came to a halt for few seconds. I now recognize the voice. It's the same I've been yearning to hear for months.

"Khushi!"

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