The city of white lies

The start of a crime lord

I was a small-time thug stealing what I could i did pot and other luxuries of being a criminal I went from low to high real fast ya see I had a friend that always saw the darkness in me and he said, " buddy, if ya keep runnin down this road well I'm gonna have a new partner soon". I shrugged it off I never thought anything of it all that went through my mind was her day in and day out I would wake from cold sweats in the middle of the night and cry myself back to sleep because I missed her so damn bad. Even though I knew I was pullin my own leg I still had hope that one day she would come my way once again my rose my sweetheart. Most of the time I kept it cool that is until someone would mention her like a good friend of mine Alexander me and him go way back but he knows how I feel about her he once jokingly said look there she is I looked and saw nothing and I told him don't you ever play like that again ill take a lot of shit but don't ever play about my rose  or else you'll have a bad time old friend. But I made my way up the criminal food chain and in the middle of an armed robbery that yours truly was controlling I got double-crossed, my so-called "friends". Got put in the pin for a few days since this was my first offense so they gave me a slap on the wrist. after that I was tired of being played with I wanted more I craved more and I had the motivation a broken confused angry heart and the cool to pull it off. So I go wise up and I try to talk and meet with one of the biggest mobsters around Don Dee the second I did get to talk to him and I said I wanted to join his crooked empire not my exact words but you catch my drift so that went as well as you might have hoped I got the shit kicked out of me in a back alley and got spit on and called an I don't even know what he said but I knew I didn't like hit but as he spoke and as he looked at me with his cold eyes that have seen death at a very young age the type of eyes that would kill me without a second thought. When I got home I wrote her a letter you could probably guess who yea rose and I wrote how I hated my life right now and how my dad is trying to force me to take over this business of his bout dry cleaning and oil and I don't want that I wanna do something that makes me a happy and I don't want you to think I'm weak but I'm just trying to be strong for you I still have hope you do too. yeah? Then the family walked in and started yelling at me for something my mom said something is wrong with me like you would say to an insane person and welp that hurt a lot my dad said I'm failing him as a son because I won't follow his dream for me. My older sis just sits there and not says a word she is the smart one around here and I feel so inferior compared to her I've always  never been good enough for anyone and I don't know if I'm even good enough for her anymore I pray to god that I am but the letters I would write her I would never send them for I thought she would pity me I just want to love her and be there for her because I helped a lot of people did what I could to keep going and not give up.  But I got  nothing back so I went cold I went dark from the world entirely I opened a window the smell of cigars and the yelling of a married couple next door filled the night and I said must be nice with a smile and as I smiled a tear fell down my cheek and I went to sleep with the tears of the past still lingering in my head.