Tentative

When Nature Pocket Dials~Evie

I've never been excellent at anything, just perfectly okay at everything. Well, most things at any rate. Just don't ask me to do math. I don't know who made this world, and I probably never will; but I do know that they didn't account for little catastrophes, like me or that thing ear buds do when the volume only works on one side.

It's like when someone pocket dials you and you pick up and you hear them making fun of you... No? Is that just me? It's like I was a pocket dial that didn't cease to exist just kind of, never stopped ringing. Think of it like this: you had them in your contacts, you were eventually going to call or text, it just happened by accident. Or you sent a risky text to the wrong person, about that person.

My life so far has been an eternal existential crisis, one earth shattering bombshell after the other. One day you're sitting in class doodling at it hits you, you exist, you take up space on earth, you have a purpose; a greater task that you have fixed for you. Something you can't change, but people say you can anyway, so you're inevitably going to try.

Yeah, I know. That happens to me on a daily basis.

People should also have some regrets, minimal, but still there. I don't have regrets so much as what ifs. For example, what if I hadn't done that? What if I chose the other option? What if I'm not fulfilling my purpose? What if something I did killed my soul mate? What kind of crap have I gotten myself into?

It's not that I despise everything all together, actually I just kind of dislike most things. But I like some things. I like the smell of vanilla. I like peppermint hot chocolate. I like second hand book shops. I like punk bands and free music.I like... I like having control.

In general, I don't like people I don't know. That can be slightly problematic seeing as I'd have to meet and get to know people I don't like. So that basically means I have one friend. Her name is Olive. She's a pretty, olive skinned (I assume that's where she got her name), tall girl. She's got more freckles than you could possibly count and red hair that looks like it was actually on fire. She has green eyes that legitimately look like she stole emeralds from a museum and stuck them in her eye sockets. She's also got a brilliant Scottish accent, I defiantly like her.

I'm dead serious when I say that she is the best person ever. She knows when I'm sad, she knows what to do and will do whatever for anyone. Virtually anyone, not like a criminal or anything. I almost feel like a criminal for being friends with her, for winning her affections. I feel like I don't contribute to the friendship. But it's not like I feel like I contribute anything to anyone.