Clouded

Chapter 14 - Every Night

"No matter what we're facing it don't matter. 'Cause the reason that I'm here, is the same through all these years. Not changing anything at all." - Every Night, Imagine Dragons

Liam had left an hour later when I had reassured him multiple times that I was okay. There had laid a minute amount of tension between us still as we stood facing each other in the silhouette of my doorway, the moonlight running through my windows to highlight the contours of his face. I knew from here on out that things would be different between us. We could never return to our normal state of familiarity with each other, no matter how many “I need yous” would be exchanged.

That night I fell asleep restlessly. Waking up every hour to stare at my ceiling and think about how we weren't starting this “being friends” with complete honesty. And that was my fault.

I needed to take action in the right direction.

Then next morning, I packed a small bag and caught a bus to Wolverhampton, the town where I had grown up. It would have been more expensive if I had taken a taxi, but sitting in the cold plastic bus seats for three hours made me feel that the overpriced fare would have been worth it.

We passed through the city limits and I felt the rise of familiarity overcome me as I gazed out onto the streets that stretched across. There was my school, there was my favorite restaurant, there was the place all of the cool kids would hang out on the weekends. Studying a park bench, I remembered Liam and I sitting exactly there as his soothing words calmed my sobbing posture after my first break up.

This town held too many memories.

My house came into view as I placed one foot in front of the other down the sidewalk, counting the number of cracks I walked over. The wooden porch and swaying swing taking my breath away even after all these years.

My mother's face was priceless as she opened the door to my short knocks. Her short blonde hair pinned away from her face and her morning robe still loosely woven around her petite frame.

“Julia!” she exclaimed before a smile caught its way onto her lips pushing her face into one of excitement before she pulled my shoulders to her, wrapping me in such a familiar warm embrace. She still smelled like coffee and cinnamon, just like when I was younger.

“I wasn't expecting you, love,” she told me, pulling me through the door frame and closing the door behind behind her. I could smell the aroma of breakfast in the air and I suddenly missed her hot tea and biscuits.

“I-” I broke off, not exactly sure what to say. There was so much that had happened in the short time I haven't spoken to her. What was I supposed to do? “I, um, just felt like I needed to talk.”

Her eyes narrowed and I felt the way they evaluated me under her gaze. She was always so good at reading me, being able to tell when I was upset or hiding a teenager secret. This was a bit different though and I could tell that she knew it as well as she led me into living room, gesturing for me to take a seat on the patterned sofa.