Phan Oneshots

Twenty Øne (Pilots): Very Punny

I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you ;)

What are you on about?

If I asked you on a date, would your answer be the same as your answer to this question?

...no?

Great meet me at Starbucks tomorrow at 5pm ;)

...What the heck just happened???

After my very confusing text convo with Dan, I decided to ring Louise and ask for her help.

"Hello?"

"Louise I need your help."

"Hey Phil, what's up?"

"I think Dan just asked me on a date."

"Oh my god. I'll be there in 10 minutes don't move."

"No you don't have t-" The line went dead. I sighed and laid back in my bed, waiting for Louise to show up.

She got there literally 10 minutes later. As soon as I let her in she practically dragged me to the couch and sat me down.

"Tell me everything." She demanded. I recounted the whole story for her. She rolled her eyes a bit at Dan's pick up lines. "Jesus Christ does this guy speak only in pick up lines?" I giggled and shrugged. "Well, you know what this means? We got to find you an outfit!" She exclaimed excitedly as she began dragging me upstairs. She then proceeds to raid my closet looking for the perfect outfit. Louise dropped the outfit on the bed next to me. My grey fox sweater, a pair of black ripped jeans, and my black converse.

"Wear your glasses with this tomorrow." She demanded. I picked up the ripped jeans with a hint of uncertainty.

"I don't know Louise. I'm a bit too pale for ripped jeans. I'll look weird." Louise shakes her head.

"You're gonna look fabulous Phil. Don't worry too much." I grinned and thanked her as she pulled me into a tender hug.

I headed to Starbucks the next day wearing the outfit Louise picked for me, glasses and all. As I stepped over the threshold of the cafe I saw Dan cleaning up behind the counter. It must be closing time, because there's no one else in the shop. He looked up from his work and his face broke into an ear splitting grin.

"Somebody call the cops, because it's got to be illegal to look that good!" He exclaimed. I giggled at his cheesiness. He finishes up his work and hangs his apron.

"Ready to go?" He asks. I nod and he grabs my hand and starts walking. I have no idea where he's taking me but I feel weirdly safe with him. Like nothing can touch me as long as he's here. He takes me down the street to an adorable little Italian restaurant. He goes in and the guy at the counter smiles at us.

"Reservation for Howell." Dan informs him. His last name is Howell. I think that would sound really cute hyphenated with my name.

Great I've known the guy for two weeks and I'm already planning our future. How much creepier could I get, honestly.

The waiter leads us to a small booth in the back. He gives us our menus then goes to tend to someone else. Dan looks at me and raises his eyebrow.