[JESSIE J & CHANNING TATUM FANFIC] "TEMPORARILY"

CHAP 24: DEAR CHANNING, IT'S AN HONOUR TO BE YOUR ONE

- It's in the drawer. Open it and enjoy my cheesy ass. I love you, baby. Good bye. We'll see each other soon. And do not cry because I cant be there to hand you tissues. I love you love you love love love you so so much, Jessie Cornish. Bye.

After 3 waves, the video ended. I felt empty all over again. I couldn't wait to read what's in the letter, but also didn't want to make this excitement end too quick. So I started everything again and again and again and other 20 more agains of rewatching the video. To discover every emotion on his face, to analyse every tone of him used to deliver the message to me, and to look at his handsome face repeatedly so I could elongate my survival.

After a whole hour replaying the video, I decided to allow myself to read the letter.

I carefully opened it and concentratedly read every single word on it with tears nonstop streaming down on my face. I was totally exhausted by how much I missed him just in a few hours. No, not even that long, I had already started missing him since I was asleep in my dream with the thought of him laying next to me.

"Dear Jessica Cornish,

You have no clues how genuinely happy you look when you sing. Doesn't matter whether it's in the bathroom, in bed, in front of your phone, or on stage, you're just so happy to sing.

You asked me how I am not sick of your songs already after putting them on repeatedly almost everyday since the day we met. Well Jessica Cornish, now I'm going to tell you why. Because seeing you're happy makes me happy. Because every time when you sing, I fall in love with you all over again.

Seriously I will sacrifice everything and anything I have to make sure that my Jessica can sing until the day she loses the passion for it. So just sing as much as you'd like to, sing as long as you'd love to, because baby, Channing Tatum's got your back.

You know my job can earn a lot of money, right? But have you even known the fact that I've never genuinely loved it? Well, Jessica Cornish, because it makes me far away from home most of the time, so I don't love it as much as I suppose to do. But it's weird when I talk about home now, it's not the same as it used to be for me anymore, because somehow you make everywhere you go, whether it's London or Germany, whether it's New York or China, as long as you're there, it feels like home.

For the first time and forever, I feel like everywhere this woman goes, I want to be there too. And I don't define my home as a place I live anymore, but start to refer anywhere you are at is my actual home. So every time when I'm away from you, I take it as I'm going away from home. And you know what a person does when they work far away from home? They miss home and they will do anything to spare time so they can come back. I'm working far away for now, and I promise it wont take forever.

Looking at you sleeping like a baby reminds me the night I proposed to you. To be honest, I proposed in a condition which I wasn't certain that we're forever, but I went with my heart anyway. Because that's what my heart does, no matter what will break us apart, despite if we don't belong together, I will not regret my proposal. Because when we move on, I will always remember the fact that at a specific moment in my life I really meant it, that I really wanted to marry this woman, that even though she wasn't the one God made for me but she's worth everything in the world to own a try from me, and that she's still a part of me until the day I die.

And finally Jessica Cornish, I love you so much and it hurts.

Ewww, too cliché, isn't it? But I just have to get it off my chest, otherwise it'll bother me forever.

I used to wonder how the hell did it hurt when you love someone? It couldn't be, right? Because love supposed to be sweet, healing and unhurt. Therefore, I thought that was a lie that people made up though, but now I know it really is true, and now I just found out that it does hurt. However, it hurts in an insufferable and pain-worthy way.