Clandestiny [on hold]

Chapter 3

I walk back into the house; I’m still shocked by the mess. Calix has turned the table back on its legs and has gotten a chair from the window for my mom to sit on. Zula is in the kitchen making coffee and fetching a cookie. I feel hopeless in this situation; my friend is doing a better job at comforting my own mother than I am.

I take a chair from the place where the television should be, but two legs are missing and one is broken. I think I’ll stand. I walk back over to the table by my mom. “What happened?” is all I can ask.

She looks at me with sad, terrified eyes. “You had a fight…you and Oliver…I don’t know what it’s about but it must’ve been pretty bad.” I dropped a bottle of scotch, he got so mad at me and demanded I clean it up and pay for another one; I got a bucket of bleach, vinegar and methylated spirits and was going to throw it at him, but a slight thought flew into my head that I could blind him, and instead threw the whole bucket. He’d never except that I cared about him enough to not blind him, I tried to blind him! I didn't tell him of my breif consideration for his wellbeing, and it agitated me that he ranted on about my inconsideration. So it escalated from there, about everything else we’ve fought about.

Mom continues. “I heard him screaming after you to get back in the house, when I came out he threw the deck chair out at you then came back in the house and started wrecking everything.”

“What happened to you?” I ask

“It wasn’t his fault, he was in the middle of his rampage when he made his way down the hall, and I thought he would go into Zula’s room, I was so relieved when he found it locked. He went into my room and I followed him, I just poked my head through the door as he threw the lamp in my direction. I blocked it, but i still got a good knock.”

Calix buts in, “Vevina,” he says softly. “Where’s Oliver now?”

“I don’t know; I was dazed for a while. All I remember is him looking horrified and then making a beeline for the door.” We just sit in silence for a while, finally Zula speaks. “Is he coming back?”

“I don’t know.” I hear a distinct tinge of sadness in her voice. Could it be that his possible permantent departure is upsetting her the most? I'm glad he's gone, she should be too.

Mom lifts her head to the door, “who’s this?”

We all turn; Astrid is standing silently in the doorway. “You didn’t tell me what happened to you, please tell me” she says in a defiant tone, like an official's order that I must obey.

I ignore her, “that’s Astrid. That’s not her name, she can’t remember it. I found her in the forest; she can’t remember anything so I brought her back here. I was kind of hoping we could take her into town but…doesn’t matter”

“Well, if she’s lost we can just call the police”

“I’d prefer it if you didn’t, and I’d also prefer it if you would acknowledge that I’m here when you talk about me.” Astrid says in that tone of hers.

                                                                                       ***

We’ve just spent the last three hours putting the house back together, putting things back in their place, dropping outside the things that are broken and throwing away the things that are beyond repair. Mom has calmed down quite considerably and Zula is back to her carefree self. We all sit down and write up a list of the things we need to buy again, laughing at all that’s passed. I like these moments as a family, not quite complete but still a family, and a happy one. After that we play UNO. When mom asks me again about what happened to my face, I tell her I fell and she leaves it alone.

It takes me a while before I realise Astrid isn’t around, she’s sitting back out on the porch swing. Calix sees her alone and jumps up to call her inside, but she denies his offer with a wave of her hand and a ghost of a smile. She has that picture of my family in her hands again, and something else. She puzzles me.

Mom gets up off the sliced open couch, and walks over to the kitchen to put her coffee cup back. She looks out the window as something catches her eye. Calix and I put down our UNO cards and join her to see what she’s looking at. “What are you looking at?” I ask in a cheery tone.

I get a good look at her, her expression looks like she’s seeing the end of the world blasting towards her and there’s no time left to run, a look of peaceful hopelessness. Or it could be grateful happiness...“He’s coming,” is all she says. I look out the window to see a car driving up the long driveway, dust exploding from behind. I look back at Calix; he sees the fearful look on my face, he shakes his head and gives me an expression of worry and denial.

Daddy’s home; and nothing those Russians did could be worse than what’s going to happen to me now. I’m gonna die.

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