68. Beltane Part 14: Mercury's End

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Author's Note: This is the Beltane Finale--the New Wheel begins to roll from here.

Song for this Chapter: In the Woods Somewhere by Hozier. Parts of this song feel like Mercury's perspective and part like Cernunnos' feelings, and the sound...perfect for their interaction.

Cernunnos' POV

Mercury's stench is easy to track. I force myself not to rush. I want this over as quickly as possibly so that I can go to Cerridwen, but Mercury is still a god, if a much weakened one. He is cunning and he is strong, and he has had more time than I intended to prepare his own attack.

I follow the scent of gasoline and human sweat and godblood to the place Sucellus and my huntsmen must have dropped him. It takes me only moments to pick up his trail. He's heading East, away from the lake, into the densest part of the forest. Smart. Good cover for him. He would be more difficult to track if it were not for his stench. An occasional print or broken branch confirms where my nose leads.

The night is perfectly dark. Hundreds of creatures watch me with pale eyes. None skitter away nor molest me. I am Lord of Beasts. They sense my dark and deadly mood, and they have come to keep vigil with me.

I step over logs and beneath rhododendron fronds, moving silently. His scent fades, his tracks stop abruptly. I look around, double-checking. No, I have missed nothing. My eyes move to the canopy.

He's there, up a tree, balanced on a large limb, his back against the trunk. His pale hair is streaked with blood, his eyes are closed. I think he's foolishly allowed himself to fall asleep, but then he speaks.

"I have no mind to flee you, Cernunnos. In truth, I wish for a quick death, even if it is a grisly one. I am so eager to return to the Roman way, that even the Underworld will suffice. I am sick of this place. It reminds me of her and I am...heartsore."

I climb the tree opposite him, and sit upon the limb, staring at him. "You know nothing of Cerridwen, you fucking Roman bastard."

"She had a...wild and fierce spirit. I have existed a very long time, and until I met her, I did not know what being alive actually felt like."

He sounds sincere. It's a quality I've never heard in Roman speech. "I suppose you don't believe me, though. I suppose you can't understand why I would kill the goddess I desired."

"I understand perfectly why you killed her. You thought her death was a means to accomplish both your aims. You thought it would unbalance me enough to defeat me, but also to win her. Your rape of her immortality did not humble her enough, did it? You thought death would. You say you liked her fierceness, but in truth, you thought a little death might soften her towards you. You thought women like the men that can rule them, and all that bullshit. You thought you could find her in her afterlife and re-cloak her in her immortality as your Queen, and that she would be grateful that her murderer became her savior."

He shrugs. "I suppose, it was something like that, yes. Though, you left out the anger. I was angry with her, for the way she dumped me, without any remorse at all. When we were together, I...I admired her. Very much."

"If you truly admired her, why did you spend the few weeks she spent at your side complaining and belittling her?"

He shrugs. "Should I have shown her the tenderness that I was beginning to feel, only to have her rebuff me? She did not want feelings from me. She came to my bed mostly to pain you."

"Tenderness? You did not love her," I say coldly.

He looks at me levelly, his handsome face marred by the violence of Maeve's spell. "No, I suppose not. But she made me wonder if I could. And when I ended her existence, I felt...well, I felt."

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