Let's Spit Some Words Out

Thing 3: Poem

Written: Monday, May 14, 2018 at 10:59 PM

Poem

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get on the orange road and eats some pineapple. Get her hair and kiss her hand

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Thanks for reading! Tell me what you think...! ... :v

A/n:

Here's some context for ya: I was up really late doing a French project for school and I was particularly upset with somebody. (not gonna say who she is cuz I wanna protect her privacy) For the project, I had to make up a map with different kinds of roads and places and name them correctly. That somebody (who I'm really close with) kept pressuring me to do certain things for the project to get it over with and I could get some sleep. (like, she cares about me) But I didn't agree and I wanted to do some other things for the project, like naming one of the roads on my poster l'avenue ananas instead of l'avenue orange. I started getting really stressed out about if I should make the changes I wanted or not, if I might offend her, or if I might just waste more time for sleeping doing more complicated things, I'm so tired; what if I'm too tired to go back and change the names again? I keep wanting to do some many different things with my map, and in result I'm not doing anything; please stop bothering me... Please just not pay attention to me for a bit and I might be able to think straight... I don't want you to be stressed....

So, I got really anxious and I just wanted to... I don't even know. So I vented. I was writing a paragraph how to get from one place to another on the map I made up (cuz that's one of the requirements), and as I was writing I lets some of those scrambling heavy thoughts out, and also kinda took a jab at my buddy too.

Honestly, that feeling I had was literally being in an industrial world at a blue misty park, purple, and wanting to pull her by her hair and sneer or throw her onto the ground, black and purple heavy fog. Yikes... but then I realized she was trying to help me, and I was like, "Ha ha. Well, that's not helping," and then the scenario changed to, instead of sneering or throwing someone, I pull her by the hair painfully and sassily kiss her hand. Like, "YO! YOU ARE... trying to help me, and I really appreciate that. But like, just kidding, cuz I actually really hate you." I really appreciate her caring, but I was too tired to tell her that she was hurting me and my feelings. She wasn't hitting me, but what I mean is, she was yelling and expressing her stress and kept saying she was trying to help me and kept rushing me to do as she says. She...wouldn't try to understand that I was feeling bad, and that I didn't appreciate what she was doing. But, I didn't want to hurt her or make her think I didn't appreciate her.

This was quite a ride of...memories, while writing this, but I'm glad I decided to write this, cuz I love you guys to read this. If you have any other questions about this story, then totally feel free to ask! I love talking about this stuff. Luckily, I managed to grab a talk with the someone and I was able to explain how I felt, and how I feel like that sometimes. She explained what she meant, and how she'll always want the best for me. We talked about how we could do things differently later and next times; I think we both learned a lot more about ourselves, how we both have so much more to learn in the future, and how we're constantly learning more now, here, in the present.