Life After War (A Hunger Games Fanfiction)

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Kids, go right now." I said waving my hand.

Peeta hasn't had a flashback since a few days after the war ended. What made him remember about the Capitol? Was it Gale? Or was it when we told our kids about my life? I don't know, but what I do know is that Peeta is going to try and kill me. I have to stay away from him, but I don't want to. And nobody is here to stop me.

Peeta is tightly crushing a couch pillow. He's trying to fight it. He's trying to come back to me. But the flashback is too strong, stronger than him. And I know Peeta isn't going to win.

"Why, mommy? What's wrong with daddy?" Rye asked.

"Just go, right now." I order.

"But-"

"Go to your room, now!" I shout.

Willow pulls Rye's arm upstairs and they disappear. I turn my attention back to Peeta. He loosens his grip on the pillow and opens his eyes. For a split second, they're ocean blue but then they turn black. I back away slowly. He gets up from the couch and pulls his arms up, towards my throat.

He lunges forward but I duck and run into the kitchen. Peeta follows me.

"Peeta," What do I say to him? Maybe I should lock him up somewhere until he turns back to normal. No, I can't do that. He wouldn't do that if I were the one having flashbacks. I have to help him. "Peeta, listen to me."

He ignores me and lunges forward again. I duck once more. "Peeta! This isn't you."

"This is me." He replies.

"No, it isn't. The Capital did this to you. Remember? You were taken away from me. In the last arena, the Quarter Quell. They kidnapped you, and hijacked you." I say.

He ignores me again. "You killed my family. You destroyed my home. I have nobody anymore, because of you!" He yells at me.

"I didn't do this! Snow did! President Snow, he's dead now."

"Your a mutt! You killed everyone here! There's nobody left that I love!" He shouts.

My heart sinks. But I can't feel this way, because this isn't Peeta. This isn't my Peeta, the one that loves me. This isn't the one that gave me the bread when we were eleven. And this isn't the one that I love.

"You love me. When I say stay with me, you reply always. You gave me bread when we were eleven. Your a painter, a baker. Your favorite color is orange, like the sunset. You told the whole world that you love me in your interview for the first Games." I say. Tears wanted to roll down my cheek, but I didn't let them. I had to stay strong, for Peeta.

"Your a liar! I don't love you!" Peeta shouted. My heart sank like a anchor. He does love me, I have to keep telling me that. He loves me. "You killed my family! Your a stinking mutt!"

I just then remembered something, a memory, that I hope will get Peeta back.

"You want to be more than just a piece in their Games."

I remember that night clearly. It was the night just before the first Games. Neither of us could sleep so we went to the rooftop. That's where he told me he wanted to be more than just a piece in their Games. He told me if he was going to die, he wanted to still be himself.

Peeta stopped chasing me. His arms dropped to his side and his black eyes turned blue. I smiled and hugged him tightly. He didn't return it, though. I let go to see his expression. He looked angry. But I knew he wasn't angry at me, but at himself.

"I did it, didn't I?" He asked.

I didn't answer him. My smile turned upside down. I looked down at the floor. A few seconds later, Peeta ran out the back door. I called after him, but he didn't look back. I have to chase after him, but I can't keep the kids alone. Not after what happened with Rue, I can't bring myself to leave them alone.

Just then, Haymitch came staggering in without knocking.

"Do you have-"

"Stay with the kids!" I said cutting him off and leaving the house, following Peeta. I could still see him run off into the woods. He can't run too fast because of his artificial leg. He then disappeared behind several trees.

When I finally made it to the woods, I shouted Peeta's name. But there was no answer. I kept calling, nobody answered me. Then, I saw Peeta crouched down against a tree, head in his hands. I walked over to him and crouched down beside him. I placed my hand on his back, moving it in a circle.

"You shouldn't be near me." He finally said after a few minutes of silence.

"I can't stay away from you." I say with a smile.

"I could've hurt you."

"But you didn't." I say.

"But I could've!" He almost shouted. He finally looked at me. His eyes were red and puffy.

"Peeta. . ."

He stood up and so did I. We stared at each other for a while. My gray eyes meeting his blue ones.

Then he finally said, "I have to go." His voice cracked.

"What do you mean?" I ask getting worried.

"I have to get away from you. I could have another flashback and hurt you. Or worse, kill you."

I shook my head. "Your not leaving me."

"I have to." Tears fell from his eyes. I could tell he tried holding them back, but failed.

I walked closer to him and wiped the tears away, only for more to come. "Please don't go. I need you here, with me." I begged.

"I'm dangerous."

"But I can help you. I did it once, and I can do it again." I say.

He just stood there, staring at me with tears streaming down his cheeks. I felt like crying now, also. Why did he want to go? He has me, his wife, and children. How could he possibly want to leave?

He looked at me, with a sad glaze. Then he turned away and started to walk away, but I grabbed both his hands, making him face me again. Now tears were coming down my cheeks. "Stay with me."

He opened his mouth as if to reply, always, like he usually does. He's used to it. His instincts are telling him to say it, but instead of listening to them, he closes his mouth.

"I'm sorry." He whispered as a fresh set of tears fell. He drops my hand, gives me one last kiss on the cheek and walks away, knowing I won't follow him. Because I'm now paralyzed with sadness. I sank down to my knees, putting my back against the tree where Peeta sat. I pulled my knees to my chest, and cried.

Peeta left me. He left me.