Gone in a Cloud of Smoke

Chapter 8

I cursed in my first language when my eyes locked on the remnants of pain, allergy and cold pills that were joined with a puddle of vodka and broken glass. The sharp and pungent odor of homemade chemicals mixed together put an envelope around the room.

Nae’s mouth dropped open as she hopped down from my arms. Her breathing was fast and faltered when she knelt down on the ground next to the liquid. “What the hell is this?”

“Uh, um, vell…” I could not come up with the correct words.

She wafted some of the odor towards her and cringed at the smell. “This is alcohol!”

You are done.

My teeth sunk into my bottom lip and the nails on my fingers dug themselves into the back of my neck. “Yes…”

Nae coated her fingers in the vodka and bowed her head, turning her back to me so I could not see her expression. The deafening silence in the room was only broken by the heavy sounds of Nae’s breathing. “Where did you get this?” she finally asked as she crossed her arms over her chest.

My heart pounded hard against the wall of my chest. Closing my eyes and opening them again to the same scene, I took a deep breath. “My father makes it all. He taught me how when I was younger.”

Her fingers brushed a plastic bag filled with allergy medicine. “Are these pills?”

I nodded even though she could not see it. “Yes. Pain, cold, allergy.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she snapped as she made her fingers even more wet in my father’s vodka recipe. “My father throws himself into getting rid of substances, anything that can be abused. I’ve been raised around the preaching that it’s all bad. Do you drink?”

I did not speak for a moment.

“Andrei!” Nae turned to face me, still on the ground. Her face was hard, but her eyes glassy. “Do you drink?”

With reluctance I nodded. “No more than one glass of vodka a day, but yes. I have never been drunk once in my lifetime.”

“Yeah, but most of this country has been, that’s why we have the ban in the first place!” she pointed out in an angry tone, throwing her hands in the air. Her voice cracked when she tried to speak again.

“My father has the best intentions,” I said with desperation filling my voice. “and so do I. People are in pain, Nae! They have to be dying to get at least some treatment. The hospitals only will let people lay in their beds and cry for a fee!”

Nae’s hands pulled at her hair and her head bowed down again. She stood only about a meter away from me. “I know that! Do you think I like that, Andrei? I don’t, it drives me crazy!”

I spun around so I was facing the fridge rather than Nae’s expression. “We vant to help people,” I said in a flat tone. “We only sell people one bottle of alcohol at a time, and the medicine is for anyone vith a pain in their body or a sickness the doctors do not vant to fix.”

“It’s dangerous.”

“I know.” I put my elbows on one of the counters and buried my head in my hands, grabbing at my hair so I could pull it out. Cursing to myself, I remained like that for at least two minutes.”

“My mom was killed by a drunk driver…”

My hands moved away from my face and the intense beating inside my body seemed to halt for a moment. I stared at the wall, replaying Nae’s words in my head before turning to face her. She had her hands over her mouth and was looking down at the wooden floors.