Her Royal Badass|✔

01|

Snow Carr.

        I clutched my thin robe around myself as I walked down the cold streets at about 10pm, I was more than tired and exhausted, don't even get me started on the hunger that was gnawing at my stomach. These works are so selfish and heartless, they didn't care about me, all they cared about was what goes through their mouth and into their stomach.....and unfortunately that happens to be all the flesh inside of my stomach. They were eating my stomach to fill their own stomach?, just how insensitive is that?.

       It's been three days since I ran from Amanda's brothel and so many times have I considered going back to beg but then I would never allow myself to be ridiculed like that, I would rather die than sell myself to some stupid men as an object of fun. Who knows if they even have infections?, brothels should always request for medical forms before allowing people to make payment. Unhealthy lots!.

        "You're so stupid Snow, so so stupid,now you have turned yourself into a business advocate for a brothel, way to go darling, way to go!" I said to myself defeatedly. The only thing I picked from Amanda's brothel was the 50 dollars I owned to myself and I have just about 10 dollars left. I couldn't help the bitter taste that left in my mouth. Just when I thought I had moved on, just when I thought I had scaled the hurdle of begging for food and picking up dirty foods by the roadside, that I had made a mockery of sister Kay's words when she told me I would never get by. I could almost picture her smirking cynically at me as I strolled the streets in nothing but a nightrobe and a very hungry stomach.

          I found a chair right outside a big mall and I took my seat as I watched cars fly by, I couldn't help the jealousy that sprung up in my heart, people in cars heading to the safety of their home to a goodnight sleep and most probably a filled or half filled stomach. How amazing would it be if I could have a roof over my head and a job that paid me enough to get food into my stomach.

        "Shut up Greg!" I heard and I turned to see a woman on the phone and carrying a sleeping young girl, who looked about 10. She was all dressed in pink sneakers, blue jeans and pink fur coat.

        "What the hell are you saying Greg?, I told you!, I don't want it. Your daughter needs your love Greg, not your money!. I've heard enough of this.....a car?......is this about a car?, Greg, she's 11....as much as she's your daughter Greg, she's mine too and I'm the one who stays with her all the time while you are away doing God knows what!, she doesn't need a car, are you even serious right now......you know what Greg, I'm done, I'm not having this conversation anymore, I'm not even in the appropriate place to have a conversation, I took Jenny out for her birthday and we're on our way home, currently waiting for the driver...........he's running a little late...... What?......Greg, he's just 15 minutes behind schedule and you want to fire him?, you know what?, goodnight. I sincerely hope that next year, you won't forget your daughter's birthday!" I think she ended the call cause the next thing I heard were soft sobs.

       Guess money isn't everything afterall, but at least she had a car and a house, she could drive straight to her house and cry peacefully into her soft pillow. Me?, If I wanted to cry, I'd have to find a hiding spot, away from people's prying eyes and cry my heart out. Except I don't cry, at least not anymore. Crying everyday for a whole year would surely make you get tired of wasting salt water, especially when nothing changes after you cry, you just end up with a wet face and a tired and weak heart. I couldn't afford to waste any strength, I do not have enough in the first place.

       I placed my head on my laps and decided to get some sleep, sleep sometimes makes the hunger go away, just for it to come back the next morning but tonight, the hunger was so bad I couldn't even get any sleep, so I decided to use the remaining ten bucks to get myself something to eat, if I die of hunger tonight, someone else would spend the ten bucks. Why not use all my money and die later.