Crystal Or Crys Hoye is Alfie's 'Best Friend', Atticus Hoye, younger sister who ran away and started living with Alfie since she hates her family.
[Mitchell Harper]
[Bad Education Movie]
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"the fishing town of Port Jago" Susan said happily as we dragged ourselves off the bus. "breath in that crisp sea air"
"ugh smells of minge" Mitchell complained.
"Like you'd know" I retorted back to him then.
"Is he related to you?" Jing looked at me. I was about the speak when sir cute me off.
"Her dad, the local MP, a bit marred by it" he explained as I rolled my eyes.
"Do you think they've got a McDonald's?" Joe asked
"No, Joe, I don't. I think we're in a creepy town on the middle of butt fuck nowhere" Cleo said back to him then I felt a bit on my arm "you that's a genuine sign".
She pointed to a sign that read 'Fudge Packers Wanted'.
"Young lady, Cornwall, is not some medical backwater. It is a modern, cosmopolitan county, with both feet planted firmly in the 21st century.
"Um, guys" remm dogg said as we looked to see some creepy pantomime people dressed up drugs clothes, are they on steroids?
"What..the fuck?" Alfie asked looking at the creepy music and people.
"This is the port jago summer solstice parade" Susan told us, smiling at the parade. "There are the hobbit holes" she pointed out
"Come so the bridal dance with a horse young virgin" a creepy man walked over to chantelle.
"Virgin? Your braking up the wrong tree there mate" Mitchell commented.
"Shut up!" She scolded
"Right should we get going before the pantomime horse knocks over one of the children?" Alfie suggested. _______________________________________
"Nout under Wickers, my lovely" the lady at the front desk told Alfie. "I do have eight rooms for the dussledorf academy der Cunts"
"That's us, Guten Tag" Alfie lied.
"Can we go on a helicopter tour?" Mitchell asks picking up a flyer.
"Oh, no need, I've arranged a very special treat for us tonight" Susan said and we actually were interested for once. "We are on a VIP guest list to visit the lesser of the Cornish rebellion, Micheal Angoff's grave"
Our smiles dropped as we were expecting something more bigger.
"That's a treat?" Stephen gasped. "Were going to a graveyard"
"Right, what happened to our free time?" Alfie demanded.
"Oh you didn't seriously think, I would let you run amock in this town." Susan stubbornly answered back.
"You know what? You win" he said "I admit, this trip is a write-off but I'm warning you, Susan, when they leave school, I'm gonna take them on a holiday that is so batshit mental if it was a movie everyone would be played by Nicholas cage!" That's when I felt guilty, it was the last time we were all seeing each other.
"When they leave school?" Susan already knew.
"Yes...when they leave school" he easily said back.
"They haven't told you?" She chuckled.
"Guys what going on?" He looked towards us.
"Were leaving, sir, well we've left" Stephen told him sadly.
"But where?" He asked again.
"Beauty School" Chantelle.
"Brit School" Stephen.
"Anyhere that ain't school" Cleo
"Theatre School" I finished off the rant.
"Joe?" He asked.
"Joe is going to a sixth form college that is far away from you as is humanly possible" Susan spat at him.
