Try Me

37.

"I feel you ma, I'm definitely dragging everybody out there this time. America is a shitshow right now." Jay sighed.

I smiled at him and rubbed his arm, "Well I'm proud of you for knowing that you fucked up and even prouder that you're going to do something this time babe." I laughed and shook my head. "Let's move to a lighter topic for once in our lives." For a second, I imagined what our conversations would be like if we stuck to more palatable topics and avoided uncomfortable ones.

"Nah, tell me your biggest regret first." Jay stopped walking and held me close to him.

I breathed in his scent; he always smelled like home. "It sounds cliché but I don't regret anything in life. Things only happen because they're meant to; I've learned to live with all the aspects of life that I can't control." I shrugged; it was a difficult pill to swallow at first but I was a better person for knowing.

"I love that answer." Jay kissed my forehead. "I'm starting to believe that true happiness comes from understanding that bad times are inevitable; it's about how we deal with the bad situations that determines our feelings." Jay rested his chin on the top of my head as I nodded in agreement.

We stood in silence for a while, my eyes were closed as I leaned into his chest. "Jason."

He chuckled and pulled my hair so that I would look at him. "Kira?" He replied, it always felt weird to hear him call me by my name.

"I appreciate the fuck outta you." I said to him as we stared into each other's eyes. "On some real shit."

"I appreciate the fuck outta you too lil gangstress. Come on, let's go home." He took my hand while we walked back to the restaurant. Jay unlocked the door for me when we made it back to the restaurant and let me know that he wanted to do a last check on the staff before he left, I texted Lea and Jasmine while I waited.

We planned to hang out the next day, though we worked together, Jazzy had been locked in her design studio on most days that month and Lea had been focusing on the warehouse. The three of us were inseparable, so even the smallest amounts of time apart seemed longer to us. It seemed like whenever we hung out socially, it was as a group of six; it was either that, or Lea and I were with our significant others. Though our last night out together didn't necessarily go as planned, a lunch date in the city seemed like it had less margin for error.

I was startled out of my thoughts when Jay got into the car, "You scared me." I whispered with a slight chuckle.

"It's your fault for being too focused on your phone. You've got to pay better attention to your surroundings sis." Jay snapped his fingers and started the car.

I rolled my eyes, "Don't call me sis, it's weird." I laughed when he stuck his tongue out at me.

"I regretted it the moment that it left my mouth to be honest." Jay chuckled and sped off, "Did you enjoy yourself today?"

I nodded although his eyes were on the road, so I spoke out loud. "Of course, I love that we still make time for dates. Today was perfect." I sighed, completely content and ready to be home.

"I promised myself that we would always have good dates after I fucked up in the beginning." Jay confessed as he placed on hand on my thigh. "I could have lost out on the best thing that ever happened to me because I put work first. Never again." Jay shook his head and winked at me before placing his eyes back on the road.

My cheeks heated up at his words; he had never told me that before and it added a new layer to my appreciation of our dates. "It's crazy how long ago that seems." My eyes started to droop as I fought my fatigue; although I'd had a great day, it had been a long one and I was more than ready to call it a night.