Dear Buddy, Love Vi (3)

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My dearest mediocre singer,

Jesus Christ, I miss you too. You have no idea how much this place sucks. I would give anything and everything to go home and go to school and just be normal (or at least as normal as I can possibly get). All I'm allowed to do is sleep, hang around in the commons, and do my school work (which is ridiculously hard when you haven't learned any of it). I'm on so many pills I can't even count. I can't really tell what I'm feeling anymore, which is way worse than being sad. I just sit around in my room like usual. Only I have to awkwardly sit in silence because there's no radio or records. Silence drives me crazy. It reminds me of when Paris was under a bomb threat. Everything was so silent until you heard the bomb falling and eventually crashing onto Earth. I always feel on edge when it's silent because I still feel like it's the moment before utter destruction.

Ooooohhhhhh! Yeah, I'm not supposed to talk about this, but what did they expect? So I found out why everyone is here! I'm obviously here because I can't fucking function like a human. Emma is here because she slit her wrists with a razor in the bath. She said she was just bored of living, so she just decided to kill herself as a spur of the moment type deal. Then there's Nelly who also attempted suicide because her dad beat her. Wyatt is here because he's a homosexual. Crazy, right? Being a homo doesn't mean you're mentally insane, it just means you like guys. Who am I to judge who he wants to sleep with? And Noah is here because he's been having "homicidal ideation". Like, he wants to kill his family. If they're really as bad as he describes them, then I don't blame him. They seem like douche bags, anyways.

Can I just say that OH MY GOD do I miss Ginger. I miss her kneading her little paws on my stomach and chest. She's the cutest little creature I've ever seen! (And yes, that includes you. Ginger is far cuter than you).

I guess I miss you too. Just a little bit. I only reallllllllly wish you were here so I could annoy you while you're trying to write or something. I wish you were here because I miss napping with you, and when you don't wake up before me I poke you until you wake up and/or push me off the bed. I wish you were here because I miss hearing you tap on my window and scaring the shit out of me. I wish I could just get out of here. Yeah, I have to admit it's helping, but I miss the outside world. I'm going to end up like an inmate who keeps committing crimes because he forgot how to live outside of prison. Oh, and I've read The Great Gatsby like seven times. I don't have any other books. When you get this, can you bring me some more at your next visit? And can you explain how to do this chem packet? It's making no sense.

Okay, I need to go to my appointment with Dr. Maddison. I'll see you soon.

I love you.

With some love from the nut house,
     Violet

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